Hooked Up and Locked Down
by LayAtHomeMom
Summary: All he wants is a distraction. And a distraction is what he gets when a night out with friends leads to a steamy hook-up. Of course, sometimes things look different in the morning... but that's the trouble with one-night stands in locked down Boston.
1. Chapter 1

**Rating: M**

**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyers owns all things Twilight - I just like to get weird with her characters.  
****Thanks to LovinRob for betaing – she smacked it up, flipped it and rubbed it down.  
****Thanks to Carrie ZM for doin' me… the honor of pre-reading this crazy fic.  
****Thanks to AmandaC3 for the fantastic banner.  
****And to the Triangle of Curls Girls for all of the encouragement.**

* * *

*********Important A/N*********

**This fic is LOOSELY based on an article from Esquire  
**"**The Problem with One Night Stands in Locked-Down Boston"  
****There is a hyperlink on my profile if you are interested in reading. ****This ****fic is in NO**** WAY is meant to  
****make light of or ****show any disrespect to those affected by the Boston Marathon Tragedy.  
****Our heart goes out to our beautiful city by the water.**

* * *

**Alright dolls, this fic requires some reader participation.  
****Use your best Boston accent while reading a la Mark Wahlberg in Fear  
****or ****Matt Damon in Good Will Hunting.  
****I tried not to write in the accent too much – didn't want it to distract.  
****So drop those R's and switch those INGs to IN's**

**Ladies… I give you Bostonward.**

* * *

**Chapter 1 - Distractions**

Thursday – April 18, 2013

6:45 pm EDT

Boston, MA

I feel antsy. My leg bounces nervously and I tug at my hair out of habit. I'm running out of ideas to keep myself occupied.

I consider checking my Facebook, but I can't because I'm currently dodging Jane's messages to meet-up for coffee to 'talk' about the _incident_. Well, that _and_ my mom's constant Candy Crush Saga requests. The guys at the station are obsessed with that game, especially Emmett. Rose is trying to wean him off of it as we speak. He's like a heroin addict. Gets the shakes whenever he's near a cell phone and shit.

I yawn and stretch while eyeing the TV remote. I don't wanna do it. I don't wanna turn it on. And I don't wanna see it as it's replayed repeatedly or hear the speculation from the terror experts. Seriously, who wants to specialize in that field? It's fucked up because I don't wanna forget or become numb watching the coverage, but I can't relive it over and over again either. I just can't.

My phone vibrates in my pocket and I answer it not botherin' to see who it is, grateful for the distraction.

"Hello?"

"Yo! Where you at, kid?" Emmett's voice booms on the line. I hear Riley in the background and it sounds like they're at the bar.

"Home. I'm about to grab some food. Why - you out?" I ask as I head to the kitchen and open my fridge to find that I only have two pieces of bread, a sip of OJ, and every condiment known to man.

"We're at Whitney's. We gotta booth in the back. Ro's meetin' us later. You comin'?"

My food options aren't looking too good unless I am in the mood for a hot sauce sandwich, which I'm not, so I shut the refrigerator door.

"Uh… Yeah, I'll see you in a few, bro."

A night out is just the kind of distraction I need, I tell myself as I jump in the shower and lather up. I need to get out of my apartment and away from the around the clock coverage of the tragedy that befell my beloved city. The dull ache in my chest ebbs as I scrub my hands over my face in frustration, replaying Monday's events in my head for the millionth time. I remember Emmett and I running to the ambulance as the first calls came in over the radio. I see the crowded streets and panicked pedestrians searching for loved ones and seeking safety. I squeeze my eyes shut, willing the images to stop their assault, but they keep coming and the chaos continues in my head.

I don't care how seasoned an EMT you are or how many calls you've been on; there are some calls that ultimately change you forever. This will always be that call for me. To see it first hand, how the violent and senseless act of a few ruined the lives of so many was both heartbreaking and terrifying to me. I'm certain that the intent of the act was to bring a city to its knees and put a nation on notice. But the fact of the matter is that it only served to bring out the best in many of us.

The media outlets are going crazy right now with all the speculation over two suspects. Their pictures are everywhere, and I am wondering how the boys in blue are going to stop the fellas in Roxbury and Dorchester from issuin' a Louisville Slugger style beatin' on the perps if they find them first.

I throw on some jeans, a beater and a Henley. I don't have the patience to fuck with the hot mess of hair on my head so I just throw on my Sox cap to the back and hit the avenue, hoping to find the distraction I need outside of these walls.

* * *

Whitney's is pretty quiet for a Thursday. Most of the patrons are all huddlin' around the TVs. I throw a chin nod to the townie regulars Mr. Banner and Coach Clapp and head back to our booth.

"How ya doin', kid?" Em asks me as he motions for the waitress to come over.

I shrug since my head is all over the place and he nods because his is too. I am pleasantly surprised that Em and I have the same agenda when he orders us some Guinness' and a few rounds of shots. I like where his head is at.

As I check out the scene around me, I peep Riley mackin' on some tore-up chick across the bar. That kid has got no game whatsoever. He also has no tolerance for booze which is sad because his sister can out drink everyone I know. Rose and I have been best friends since eighth grade, she's like my sister. My ball-bustin', Bruin lovin', beer guzzlin' sister. Em follows my eyes and checks on Riley himself.

"Yo, is he talkin' to Irina?"

"I can't tell." I say as I squint to see if the busted-up girl bears any resemblance to my old flame.

Irina is my old girlfriend from high school. I haven't set eyes on her in years, not since Rose beat her ass on a front lawn down on Hooker Avenue for doin' me dirty with some punk from Charlestown. I can't say I was too heartbroken over it 'cause she was a pain in the ass.

Riley must feel our eyes on him, because he looks at us sharply and gives us his 'watch and learn boys' smile. Of course, we raise our glasses and salute his ability to spit game to the grossest chick in the spot because we're assholes like that.

Em and I bullshit for awhile and talk about everything but what everyone else is talking about. And when the conversation winds down, the drinking begins. We start with beers and then add the shots and chasers with each. Bad decisions are being made all around. It's a good thing that Ro shows up when she does.

"Hi-ya, hun." She says, pecking me on the top of the head before she walks over to her husband and tongue fucks his face.

"Jesus you two, that's disgustin'. I'm tryin' to drink here." I scoff trying to avert my eyes.

"I know, right! It's like watchin' the goddamn Discovery Channel with these two," says the petite brunette cutie who is sidling up next to me in the booth.

"Ya jealous!" Rose snips as she straightens her clothes and waves to the waitress.

"Oh! Little Manhattan! How ya doin', sweetheart?" Em says as he leans over the table to kiss my new neighbor on the cheek.

"Can't complain, how 'bout you?" She replies, sitting back down and flipping her hair over her shoulder.

She smells like sugar cookies and has a hint of a New England accent. It's faint, but it's still there. I feel like a bit of a pig because I think I am full on leering at her and imagining what a delightful distraction she'd be. Em is goin' on and on about whatever the fuck when the waitress pops over to take their orders.

"Yeah, can I get a couple of Blue Moons and a couple of Sicilian Kisses, please." Rose orders before looking to Em and I, "You two need anything?"

We each order another beer and get down to the business of getting to know each other.

"Edward, this is Bella. Bella, Edward." Rose introduces us with a wave of her hand.

"Bella," I say holding out my hand and throwing her the smirk that Rose refers to as the '_panty dropper'_. In my periphery, I see Ro shaking her head.

"Nice to meet you," she says taking my hand with a coy smile of her own. "I've heard a lot about you."

"Oh yeah?" I ask, silently praying that Rose hasn't told her any embarrassing shit.

The waitress returns with our drinks and I notice Riley coming over to creep. Rose and I look over at him just in time to see him mouth the word _'dibs'_ to me. _Game on, kid._

"How ya doin', sis?" he says kissing his sister's cheek while eye-ballin' my new little friend.

"Fine. Bella, this is my little brother Riley. Riley, this is Bella." Rose makes the introductions once again and I can barely contain the eye roll as I watch this little shit put on a swagger show with the two handed handshake. _What an ass_.

"Oh yeah, you're the new recruiter," he says recognizing that she's Rose's new co-worker while still molesting her hand with both of his. "How was the career fair today?"

I laugh when she jerks her hand free and wipes it on her pants inconspicuously under the table.

"Um, I suppose it went well," she replies before taking a sip of her drink then continuing a little more formally. "It's a lot different recruiting kids out of college than head-hunting professionals."

Rose nods and sighs. "Yeah, I spent over thirty minutes with some kid's mom today. Apparently, Tommy is a _good boy_ who was too busy to come to the career fair so his mom came on his behalf."

"Looks like Tommy's mommy would like for him to move out of the basement." I mutter.

This makes Bella snicker a bit before she adds. "It's like 'Hey Tommy, put your bong down and get your ass down to the career fair'."

We all laugh as she continues like she's only speaking to me. "I mean, seriously. I did a mock interview with a really bright girl today. Well, I thought she was bright until I asked her a question and she answered with '_IDK_'. I am worried for this generation if they can't speak in complete sentences during an interview."

Riley takes note of the eye contact and attempts another one of his prick moves.

"Not for nothin' Ed, but Irina was just askin' about ya'. She must be thinkin' of old times, huh?" He smirks as he leans down on his forearms and scoots closer to Bella.

The quirk of my brow is my only reply before Rose and Em jump in to give the 4-1-1 on Irina and unknowingly fall right into Riley's game plan.

"That chick from Hooka' Avenue is here? She should know better. Where is she?" Rose whips her head around to survey the room. "The girl is a skank."

"A skeez-ah." Em adds as if being called a 'skank' isn't accurate enough.

I just shake my head and finish off the last of my beer when I see Riley narrow his eyes, preppin' his finishing move.

"Come on, Ed. I'm just bustin' ya balls a bit. Besides, I told her all about that hot little nurse over at Beth Israel Deaconess that you've been bangin' lately."

That little punk smiles out the side of his mouth and tips his beer back in victory. Bella's eyebrows rise in response to this little bombshell. She chews on her lip and exchanges a weird look with Rose. Just as I am about to set the record straight, Em jumps in to defend my honor with a little more information than I want him to share.

"Naw, kid. That Jane chick was mad crazy. Read that Fifty Shades book and came at my boy with a pair of tube socks and a dirty spatula to spank him with. Tellin' him to call her mistress and shit."

I hear Bella snort before she takes a sip of her beer. _Thanks Em._

That arrogant prick thinks the damage is done so he goes in for the kill, leaning in close to her and speaking quietly, probably workin' his weak ass game on her. This fuckin' guy has no clue that I am about to launch a counterattack of my own. When the waitress comes by to take another order, I tap Bella's thigh to get her attention under the table while Riley's distracted. I slip my phone into her hand and put my finger over my lips to tell her not to say a word.

"Now, where were we," he says as he resumes his predatory positioning.

"I can't find my phone." I say as I play it up, patting my jean pockets and chest, looking around and under the table. "Ri, can you give it a call?"

"Yeah sure, no problem," he says whipping out his phone to dial.

His ringtone sounds and Bella pulls it from her lap admiring the picture and covering her mouth to stifle her giggles. I chuckle a bit when I see Riley's photo. I am fairly certain that Em and I are still at the top of his shit list for writing the word '_dick_' in all caps across his forehead with a Sharpie after stripping him down and dressing him in his sister's bra. That's what you get when you pass out before midnight on New Year's Eve. I can't bring myself to feel guilty for snapping the photo. It makes my day every single time it fills the screen when he calls.

"Here it is," she says turning the screen around so everyone can see.

Em starts laughing and pointing, talking about how Rose wouldn't let us put him in her underwear and shit. Rose is cacklin' too. Riley is giving me a full on bitch brow that rivals his sister's. I just smile and mouth the word '_dibs_' to him as I slide a little closer to Bella. _Sorry for ya, son._

Bella takes me by surprise when she leans into my side and tosses back her shot. From that point on, we are in our own little world. She tells me how she grew up in Bradford where her dad is a retired police chief, but she spent the summers in Florida with her mom and her step-dad. She talks about going to school in upstate New York and moving to Manhattan with her then long-time boyfriend. This girl has class and doesn't talk shit about him. Real respectful, but clear that they are done.

I tell her about growing up in Watertown, and my schooling and training in Fire-EMS. Of course, Rose and Em jump in from time to time to embarrass the shit out of me and tell stories, including ones about Irina and Jane. Bella's pretty cool, just laughing at them as they air my dirty laundry. Throughout the night, I don't miss that she subtly rubs her hand up and down my thigh, just as I am sure she doesn't miss that my arm now rests on her shoulder in an effort to keep her pressed tightly to me. High fives turn into hand-holding and shooters turn into body shots. We talk, we touch… we drink.

I excuse myself to hit the head and see Riley chatting up some college girls. Naturally, I flip him off when he tries to throw me the _'there's my boy'_ head nod. He knows he had that coming. The bathroom smells like raw sewage so I do my business and book it out of there only to find Bella standin' in the hall waiting for me.

"Heyyyy," she says, wrapping her arms around my neck, licking and biting her bottom lip again.

"Uh, hey." I cleverly reply and pull her tight against me, watching her mouth as she pulls my face closer to hers.

"Ya wanna get outta here?" She whispers against my lips and I swear I can feel my dick noddin' his head and wavin' his hand toward the exit as if to say '_after you milady_'.

I wanna answer her question, but apparently my lips have other ideas as I cover her mouth with mine. She tastes like Amaretto and Southern Comfort, my own real life version of a Sicilian kiss. She breaks it all too soon, grabbing my hand and leading me out to the front of the bar. We give Rose and Em a quick wave as she grabs her pocketbook and we make a run for it.

"Where are we headin'?" I ask as we hustle up the block closer to the square to grab a cab.

She giggles a bit and throws her arms around my waist. "Hooka' Avenue."

I laugh because she sounds just like Rosalie when she says it, then I kiss the shit out of her under a streetlight not caring who sees us. We catch a break when a Brattle cab drives by. You can tell Bella did a stint in New York just by the way she hails a taxi with an air of authority in her voice. She rattles off her address to the cabbie as she scoots across the seat. I don't even have the door shut completely and she has her leg hitched over my thigh and her hands in my hair at the nape of my neck pulling me close once more.

The driver starts trying to make conversation and I catch bits and pieces about the suspects and something or other, but I am far too distracted to hear what he's saying, especially when Bella is pulling my earlobe with her teeth and sucking it lightly into her mouth. I take this opportunity to acquaint my hands with her ass, rubbin' all up on it.

This cabbie won't shut up so I randomly throw out some 'oh yeahs' and 'ya don't says' so he doesn't realize that shit's getting real in the back of his cab. This girl is wild and I love it. When her hand slides from the back of my head down my body to cup my junk, I can't stop the groan that escapes my mouth. Bella pulls my face into her neck and tells the driver to 'step on it' as she continues to rub me down. He must get the message because he stops with the chitchat and turns up the radio. I inch my hands up her waist and gently graze my lips along her throat. I smile against her skin when I feel her shudder slightly.

"You like that, Cookie?" I murmur quietly as run my fingertips up her ribs.

She sucks her bottom lip into her mouth and nods slightly before pulling me in for another heated kiss. I lean back in the seat and she straddles my lap. I swear I have a flashback of riding home in the back of Rose's mom's minivan from the Homecoming dance with a jizz stain on my dress pants after Irina pulled me into a bathroom and dry humped me on a toilet. At the time, I remember being pretty happy that my dick was three pieces of fabric away from a real-life pussy, but bustin' a nut in a cab just doesn't have the same appeal at my age. Thankfully, the car pulls to a stop and Bella rushes out so I can pay the cabbie. He tries to tell me to keep my eyes peeled or something or other, but I ain't got time for that.

"Yeah, yeah – go Sox." I all but yell tossing him a couple of twenties and slamming the door.

Bella's got her keys out and is trying to unlock the door. A difficult feat when you have a 200 lb. drunk guy slobberin' all over you. That thought sobers me slightly. She's drunk. I'm drunk. And although I would love to do some real dirty shit with this girl, I wanna be a good guy more. So I turn her around before she can walk in her now open door to make sure that she wants to do this.

"You sure about this?" I ask as I kiss her forehead gently, and then tilt her chin up so I can look into her eyes.

"This?" She asks confused.

"Yeah. This." I explain, motioning my finger between us.

She smiles shyly as she cups my face and kisses me sweetly before threading her fingers in the hair on my neck again and whispering my new favorite word.

"Abso-fuckin-lutely!"

* * *

**A/N: I will post every Thursday night until it's done – looking at about 4-5 chapters. **

**BlueisSoul also fic'd the article as well in her hot and hilarious story _One-Night Stand in Locked-Down London. _This fic features a cocky Edward, a crazy Bella, and chemistry that sizzles off the page. Make sure to check it out, you don't want to miss this.**

**Now is the portion of the evening where Carrie ZM and I like to serve up a couple of fics that own us and we call it **_**Let**** It WIP.**_

_**Dirty South Drug Wars by Hoodfabulous –**_**Ladies – this here is a heapin' helpin' of the sexiest Southern comfort out there. Romance, drama and a little bit of angst all set against the backdrop of the dirty, dirty. Also features one of the swooniest Edwards around! *Lay dabs forehead with a hankie and Carrie ZM fans herself* This fic has us Yanks in a tizzy y'all. Go visit our girl JHood and tell her that Care and Lay sent ya'.**

_**The Art of Getting Fluffed by ChocolateSparrow**_** – The title says it all… Edward is a porn star whose peen only rises to its peak performance at the nearness of his Fluff… err… Bella. Snark, epic banter, amazing porn parody names and off the charts UST – this fic has it all in addition to being side-splittingly funny! Go check out Choc and Sparrow and let em' know that Lay and Care told you to go fluff yourself! **

**And finally - on a serious note... Our hearts go out to those in Oklahoma. If you are interested in donating to rescue and recovery efforts - there is a link on my profile to the Fandom for Oklahoma. So far some fantastic writers are donating to the cause. Please go check it out. **

**Thanks for reading! See you next Thursday!**


	2. Chapter 2 - Frenzy

**Rating: M**

**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyers owns all things Twilight - I just like to get weird with her characters.  
****Thanks to LovinRob for betaing – she smacked it up, flipped it and rubbed it down.  
****Thanks to Carrie ZM for doin' me… the honor of pre-reading this crazy fic.  
****Thanks to AmandaC3 for the fantastic banner.  
****And to the Triangle of Curls Girls for all of the encouragement.**

* * *

**Now remember this fic requires some reader participation.  
****Practice this sentence: "Pahk tha' cah in Hah-vahd yahd"  
****Don't forget to read with a Boston accent.  
Oh, and this fic is entirely in EPOV for those who were wondering.**

**Now where were we? **

* * *

**Chapter 2 – Frenzy**

April 18, 2013

11:15 pm EDT

Boston, MA

"_Abso-fuckin-lutely."_

I sigh in relief and lean down to kiss her crazy again, but she has other plans for me as she pulls me into her place and slams the door behind me. I admit it, she catches me off-guard when she pushes me up against the door and grabs the neck of my shirt.

"Kiss me," she demands as she pulls my mouth to hers once more.

More than happy to oblige, I pull her body flush to mine and turn her so I can press her up against the door. I grab a handful of that ass, while kissing the shit out of her. And just when we're getting into it, I hear a growl behind me. My head whips around, and I fully expect to see a full-size wolf or a guard dog waiting to tear me up. I see two yellow eyes peer at me from the corner across the room. Soundin' like Cujo and shit, this dog is full on snarling between growls. From what I can tell, his head sits waist high. Of course it's probably a good thing that a single girl in the city has such a large dog, but the possibility of being mauled by said large dog, not so much.

"Jacob! No thank you, sir!" Bella scolds and pats her legs twice. "Come here, pal!"

Imagine my shock when the dog hops down from the top of the recliner and then from the seat to the floor. He scurries across the wood floor and stops a few feet in front of us. There in the light from the window, I see the ferocious beast she calls _Jacob_. He's a teeny, tiny tea-cup dog who is the spittin' image of Toto. I almost feel bad for him since he is like the Mike Tyson of dogs, the voice just doesn't match his body. The little sprite is growling at me as Bella scoops him up into her arms.

"Jake, this is our new friend Edward," she reassures the little guy and waves his paw. "Say 'hi' to Edward."

I reach my hand out for him to sniff, but instead he goes berserk all snapping and barking.

"Jake, no!" she admonishes again. "Sorry, I think I am going to take him out real quick." I give her a nod before she adds pointin' behind me, "Make yourself at home. Bathroom is down the hall and the kitchen is over there."

"You need me to come out with you?"

"Nah, it's safe around here. I'll be right back."

I switch the light on in the bathroom. It's all girly, but clean and smells like Cookie. I run the water and splash some on my face. I sway a bit as the booze catches up with me and grip the sides of the sink for a little support. It's been a while since I got it in, so I look down at my junk and decide to give the boys a little pep talk. I snicker as I imagine my cock and balls takin' a knee, as if I am gonna give a speech about going the distance and being the best they can be and all that. I look up in the mirror and just mutter '_don't embarrass yourself, kid'. _

I hear the door open and close, the shuffle of feet and Bella telling Jake to go to his crate. _It's go time_.

I find her in her kitchen, trying to open up a bottle of Tylenol.

"Headache?" I ask as I take the bottle from her to open it.

She shakes her head and grabs a bottle of water outta the fridge. "I'm just tryin' to make it hurt a little less tomorrow."

We are quiet as we each pop a couple of pills. I lean back on the counter watching her lips as she takes a sip from the bottle. She smiles at me, because she caught me creepin' like a pervert.

"See somethin' you like?" She asks as she runs her hands down my chest and pulls at the hem of my shirt.

"Yeah." I groan into her neck as her hand finds my dick again.

"Me too." She says as she grabs something behind me and slams it down as hard as she can on the counter.

I jump 'cause that shit is loud and turn to see what happened. And there she is, holding a spatula like my crazy ex, just laughing her ass off. It takes me a minute to compose myself, but when I do…

"Oh Cookie, ya gonna get it now." I tell her as I pick her up, place her on the counter and wedge myself between her legs to suck on the hollow of her throat.

She throws her head back all cackling and shit. Her entire body shakes with laughter. Just when I think I have the upper hand, she comes back at me a little harder when she grabs my face and pulls me in for a mad hot kiss. She works my mouth over with hers as she swipes her tongue along my bottom lip and grazes it with her teeth. We are both practically breathless as we moan and pant while our tongues twist and turn in tandem. She surprises me again when she stops abruptly and pulls my cap off and tosses it across the room. She runs her fingers through my hair and pulls my forehead to rest against hers. I can see her eyes are wild and feel her chest heave against me with each breath. She licks her lips and then she drops her voice so it sounds all low and sexy.

"So give it to me then."

I chuckle humorlessly and let my eyes wander over her form, 'cause she has no idea how bad I wanna _give_ it to her. A small smile plays on her lips as she watches and waits to see if I am up to get wild with her. And I am. I will. But first I'm gonna play her little game. Gripping her ass, I pull her forward until her center is flush against my erection. I hear her gasp lightly when I run my tongue from her clavicle to the sensitive skin under her ear.

"How do ya want it, Bella?' I ask with a grunt and a grind.

The words must be stuck in her throat because all I hear is a soft mewl and I feel her tighten her grip in my hair and her legs wrap around my lower back.

"Huh, Cookie? Ya want it hard and fast right here on your counter?" I pause for effect, let it sink in that I am down to match every ounce of crazy she throws at me. "Do ya want it like that?"

She bites that lip in a failed attempt to hold back a moan as I skim my nose down her jaw and up the other side. I ghost my fingertips up her thighs until I reach the button on her pants. I take her earlobe between my lips and whisper against the shell of her ear.

"Take off your pants." I watch as she makes quick work of her pants and shoes and looks at me expectantly. "Now lose the shirt."

Bella gives me a wicked smile and makes a show of undoing her buttons and tosses her blouse at me. And there she sits sprawled out on the counter in a lacy little bra and panty set while she trails her hand over her stomach. It's an invitation. A dare.

"Open your mouth." I say as I run two fingers across her lips.

She opens wide and sucks my fingers hard, gliding that tongue all over them until they're nice and slick. I pull them out and run them slowly along her chin and throat and then down the valley between her tits. I can feel her stomach muscles tense as I circle her belly button and continue lower until my fingertips are at the hem of her panties.

I smirk at her as I watch her getting heated, licking those lips in anticipation. I grab her off the counter and turn her around to press my hard-on against her ass, and cup her pussy over her panties. She gasps loudly but recovers quickly as she places her hand over mine to increase the pressure of my fingers against her.

"Or do ya want it slow, baby?" I say as my hot breath fans across her cheek. "Make you work for it. "

She grabs the back of my head and cranes her neck to place her mouth on mine all wet and sloppy and awkward. I thrust against her roughly and growl against the side of her face.

"Fast or slow, Cookie?"

She swivels her hips and whimpers. "Slow. I want it slow."

I nip her shoulder and turn her so I can lift her up onto the island. She scoots up and spreads those legs for me, knocking a basket of fruit to the floor. I chuckle to myself at her eagerness. I give my dick a quick stroke 'cause it's strainin', practically begging to get wet. But I gotta be realistic. There is a good possibility that if I get in there, I'll pull a Luke Perry and only last 8 seconds which would not be a good thing. The minute I take off my shirt she reaches for me.

"Mmm… tattoos," she moans, running her nails down the Celtic cross on my ribs.

"Lay back, baby." I tell her as I cup her tits in my hands while my thumbs flick and roll her nipples over her bra. "Fuck, you're beautiful." I say as I admire how she's spread out before me. I place my mouth right over her panty covered crotch and watch her as I breathe over her sensitive spot.

"Don't," she pleads covering her face with her hands, suddenly shy. "It's probably… bad, down there."

"I want to." I tell her as I bite down on the fabric gently.

It's true too. I do. I wanna see her come undone. I wanna make her beg for it. I wanna make her scream. But not for nothin', if it smells like chowdah' down there, I'll have to cut the pussy eatin' portion of our evening short. I pull the panties off and go to work. I spread her further and hold down her thighs as I flatten my tongue and lick her from top to bottom. I tease and taste and dip my tongue in and out. I suck and nip at her clit and roll it roughly with my thumb.

"OH GOD!" She screams as her ass lifts off the island, and her hands find their way to the back of my head to clutch at the roots of my hair for dear life.

I keep at it for a while. I can barely breathe as she throws my head into a WWF style leg lock and smothers my face against her. Her gasps turn to moans, and her moans become muttered obscenities as she frantically works herself over my mouth. Her legs are so tight around my head, I am wondering if I should tap out when her entire body jerks and she screams so loud that Jake starts to bark and snarl from his crate.

"Bedroom!" She pants as she releases me and pushes off the island.

Making our way to her room, she unhooks her bra and tosses it at me. I smile as it hits my chest while I watch her ass sway. Crazy cool and mad sexy, she is the perfect distraction. Who knows, maybe more, but for tonight, she's just what I need.

Just before she enters her bedroom she looks at me over her shoulder. "Take off your pants." She orders me and I comply immediately though I stumble a bit in my drunkeness. "Slow." She adds as she turns and watches intently. "Do it slow."

I give her a crooked smirk and stroke my shaft over my boxers before I pull each side of my drawers down my legs. She runs her teeth over her lip again and turns away before walking into her room.

Jake growls as I pass him and I'm kind of a dick because I may or may not hump the air at him before I step into Bella's room and slam the door behind me. I find her digging around in the drawer in the nightstand, before she crawls to the middle of the bed on her knees.

She motions for me to come to her with her finger and a wicked smile on her face as she eyes my cock. I climb on the bed when she comes at me and pushes me down onto my back. She sways a bit as she kneels over me.

"My turn," she whispers against my cheek before she begins to trail soft kisses down my body. "I'm gonna take my time with you." She scrapes her fingernails down my torso and I groan, but she continues to tease me. "I'm going to ride you, Edward. I'm gonna ride you so slow, you'll be fuckin' begging me to move."

My dick twitches in anticipation at her words, that and the fact that she grips me tight and starts to jack me roughly. If she keeps this up there will be no ridin' whatsoever– slow or otherwise.

"Do it!" I tell her as I reach for her waist to line her up. "Show me." I demand as she puts her knees on either side of my thighs. "Ride me."

I hear the rip of the condom wrapper and snicker a bit as she fumbles with it. I unsuccessfully try not to wince and whine like a pussy when some of my hair catches as she rolls it down the base.

"Ready?"

I nod and hiss when she begins to lower herself onto me. Even through the latex, I can still feel her heat as she stretches all around me. She starts off slow, inching her way up and down my cock. She looks and feels so good wrapped around me. My hands are everywhere and I match her pace as I ghost my fingertips over her chest and then grip her ass tightly as she swivels her hips and grinds down over me. And it's slow. Painfully slow. And like she said I am on the verge of beggin'.

"Fuck!" I groan and sit up so our chests are flush against each other sticky and slick with sweat. "That's it, baby! Come on!" I encourage her as I seize her hips. "I- I'm s-so close!" I stutter as I pull her down harder and faster.

I suck a nipple into my mouth and skim the tip of my tongue against it before I pull it gently between my teeth. Her hands find my hair again and she presses me further into her chest. I am about three strokes away from embarrassin' myself so I grip her hair and kiss her hard. I can feel her insides clench a bit and she abruptly pulls her face away. I look up at her, and she looks fuckin' gorgeous with her head thrown back and her mouth open as she silently screams, her eyes shut tight.

That's all it takes and I grunt as I explode, holdin' her tightly to me while my cock pulses deep inside of her. I hold her there for a few moments before we collapse onto the bed. I think I hear myself telling her that she is fucking amazing seconds before I pass out.

* * *

"Edward."

I vaguely feel someone shake me. I hear the _Imperial Death March from Star_ _Wars_ playing somewhere in the background. I think I may even hear a helicopter as well.

"Edward. Get up."

I feel sunlight filtering in over my back and someone underneath me, push against my arm.

"Edward, your fuckin' phone has been going off for the past thirty minutes. Go put it on vibrate."

I hear Bella's hoarse voice and I realize that I am on top of her. I jump up, looking for my phone and she rolls out from under me. I rub the sleep out of my eyes and take a peek at the clock. It's a little after 9:30 in the morning. Good thing I am off today, because I think I am still drunk. First order of business is to find the bathroom. I seem to recall that it's next to her room and I feel suddenly modest as I cup my junk in the event that Jake isn't her only roommate.

As I relieve myself, I mentally congratulate my boys below on a job well-done last night. I hear Rose's ringtone start up again and I start to panic because she never calls me this early. As I open the door, Bella is there with the phone in her hand. I smile my appreciation and answer quickly.

"Hello!"

"Thank Christ! What the fuck, man? I've been callin' you for the past hour. Where in the fuck are you?!"

I don't feel like my whereabouts are any of her business so I try to redirect. "What's wrong?"

"Haven't you been watchin' the news? The city is on lock-down. SWAT teams are in the streets goin' house to house, lookin' for the suspect."

It takes a minute for me to process all the information she just said. I lean haphazardly against the bathroom doorway as she relays the events of the past twelve hours.

"Edward. Where are you?"

"Uh." I stall, looking to see if Cookie is in earshot. "I'm at Bella's place."

Rose is quiet on the other end which is strange because Rose rarely does silence. She usually falls somewhere between talking between her teeth and full on motherfucking ya if she's pissed.

"Go get Bella. And turn on a goddamn news station for Christ sakes. I think they're comin' down her block."

I take a peek out the bathroom window and sure enough the SWAT teams and vehicles are lining the streets.

"Fuck!" I shout as I hang up on Rose. "Bella, get dressed."

"What? Why? What's goin' on?" She asks as she tries to climb back in bed.

"Come on, get up." I yell from the kitchen where I start collecting my clothes.

I pick up my shirt and I notice it's wet. And when I find my pants, they are wet as well.

"What the fuck?" I mutter as I pick up my sock which is damp and stained yellow.

"Oh no… Bad boy, Jacob!" Bella yells, making my head hurt. "Oh my gosh, I am so sorry." She says as she wrings her hands nervously and bites her lip. "He does this sometimes… especially when he's feeling… jealous."

I spot my Red Sox hat near the front door which I find odd since I remember she tossed it near the table last night. I give him the stink-eye as I go to grab it.

"Edward, don't!" Bella warns.

But it's too late. I see it.

"Did he shit in my Sox cap?" I shriek like a chick and turn to Bella for confirmation that I do indeed see pint-sized turds in my hat by the door.

She looks at me sadly, nods and then shrugs.

"Why in the fuck would he shit in my cap?" I shout.

I don't necessarily expect an answer. But the one I get makes all the sense in the world.

"Well, I mean. If you wanna get technical about it, he's a New Yorker… born and bred, ya know. And a Yankee fan."

* * *

**A/N: I hope you enjoyed the lemon because it's time for things to get…awkward. **

**So glad to see so many **_**In Your Room**_** readers back for another go 'round with me. You guys make this so much fun.**

**Don't forget to check out Blueissoul's take on the article in her fic **_**One Night Stand in Locked-Down London**_**. This E/B combination is too funny and too hot to miss!**

**Also, I will be collaborating on a drabble with Hoodfabulous. We will be writing under the moniker FabulousLay - make sure to follow us on .**

**Alright – here we go with this week's **_**Let It WIP**_**:**

_**In Mates by Jonesn -**_** *Lay puts on 'Team Jonesn' t-shirt and Carrie ZM dons a 'Jonesn for Beardward' hat* Forbidden love, lust, danger and lies… and off the charts, take a fire extinguisher to your panties hot lemons… No one does it quite like Jonesn. Once you are done checking out In Mates – hit up her other new WIP that's just getting started – **_**Bear Creek Road**_**. A quiet Beardward though methinks there is a crazy, dirty boy lingering under the surface. Okay, me hopes… (HINT, HINT Jonesn)**

**Let Me by iambeagle – *Carrie ZM twirls* Love, love, love this deliciously awkward tale of two friends at a music festival. One who wants more and one who is just oblivious… UST, lemons, music references and all the feels done right. Don't miss this fun little fic, dolls!**

**Thanks to everyone who has read, reviewed, followed, fav'd, rec'd, pimped and lurked this fic. See you all next Thursday!**


	3. Chapter 3 - Complications

**Rating: M**

**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyers owns all things Twilight - I just like to get weird with her characters.**

**Thanks to LovinRob for beta'ing – she smacked it up, flipped it and rubbed it down.  
****Thanks to Carrie ZM for doin' me… the honor of pre-reading this crazy fic.  
****Thanks to AmandaC3 for the fantastic banner.  
****And to the Triangle of Curls Girls for all of the encouragement.  
**

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**Don't forget to use your best Boston accent.  
**

* * *

**Chapter 3 - Complications**

April 19, 2013  
9:45 AM EDT  
Boston, MA

"_Well, I mean. If you wanna get technical about it, he's a New Yorker… born and bred, ya know. And a Yankee fan."_

It takes everything in me not to tell her that if she wants to get technical about it, he's just an asshole. I can't call him that though, it'd be like calling her kid an asshole, which would be...bad.

"I am so sorry about this, Edward. Here, let me wash these for you," she says as she grabs my piss-soaked clothes from me and makes her way to my steaming turd filled Sox cap.

"Don't worry about the hat, just throw it away." I say as I give her pleased looking pooch a dirty look.

I feel like we should have a burial and small service for it in her backyard, play taps for the fallen or something equally poetic. But I refuse to give that little shit the opportunity or the satisfaction of desecrating my hat on a daily basis. As I'm thinking on this, I notice she's only wearing a small tank top and some barely there panties as she passes me. This reminds me that I am bare-ass naked, cupping my junk, and that a SWAT team is gonna come sweeping through the premises in a matter of minutes.

"Bella, come on. I'm serious. We gotta get dressed." I tell her urgently as I follow her to the bathroom.

"Why?" She asks through a yawn as she flushes Jake's parting gift to me.

I need for her to understand so I grab her shoulders and turn her to look out the window at the advancing SWAT team.

"The city is on lock-down. SWAT is goin' door-to-door looking for a suspect. Rose said that shit got real last night. There was a shoot-out, a car chase, I don't know. I think a cop was gunned down or something. I didn't catch everything she said."

I feel her tremble a bit and I doubt it's because she's cold. She just nods and whispers 'okay' as she walks out of the room. I hear dresser drawers opening and closing, then the distinct sounds of a magazine being ejected from a gun. I round the corner just in time to see her inserting the ammo before pushing the mag up until it locks with a click.

"Whoa, Cookie – what'cha got goin' on there?" I ask as I lean against her doorway.

Truthfully, the sight of a girl handling a gun as well as she does registers two types of responses with me. My head is sounding off the warning bells, letting me know that this chick might be a little more hardcore than I can handle. Then there is the response that comes straight from my dick who finds the madness a bit appealing. As a matter of fact, he is rising to the occasion as we speak. He's probably jerkin' his chin at her like Joey from Friends sayin' '_how you doin_'.

"Just in case. You never know," she says with a shrug, as if it's no big deal that she just loaded a gun all precise like fuckin' Forrest Gump and shit.

"Do you even know how to shoot that thing?"

I realize my mistake the minute the words tumble out of my mouth. The looks she gives me is both incredulous and scary. Eyebrows aren't meant to go that high on foreheads.

"I just mean, have you been trained? Uh, you know, to use a gun, properly."

Her eyes return to the gun and she makes sure the safety is on before she places it gently back in the drawer.

"Edward, my father is a police chief. I am his only daughter and only child. I am basically the best son he's ever had. I've been shooting guns longer than you've been getting the girls to drop their panties," she finishes with her arms across her chest.

"So that's a yes?" I ask ignoring her assumption.

"That's a yes," she says with a smirk. "Now let's get you some clothes." She goes into her closet and comes out with an opened, oversized envelope and tosses it at me. "This should fit you."

"You gotta be kiddin' me!" I say as I pull out a gigantic Yankee's jersey. It has to be at least a 4X. "I can't wear this."

"What? It's the only male clothing I have. My ex insisted that Jake would want a keepsake to remember him by, something with his scent. I've been meaning to mail it back to him."

"First of all, it's a Yankee's jersey, I'd rather answer the door with a sock over my dick." I tell her as I toss the shirt back at her. "And secondly, that thing is fuckin' huge. What are you some kinda' chubby chaser?"

She rolls her eyes and shakes her head as she stuffs the offensive shirt back in its envelope. She mutters something under her breath, but I only catch the last portion. Something about '_he wasn't chubby'_.

"You got any other options?"

"Just one," she says as she pulls out a light pink fluffy bathrobe. "It's this or the Yankee's shirt."

I pretend not to notice her smirk as I war with myself. Which one will win out, my manhood or my city pride? On one hand, there is a chance I could get shot just for wearing a Yankee shirt in this neighborhood. On the other, what kind of self-respecting man wears a fluffy robe with the word _pink_ across the ass in all caps? A loud rapping on the door makes my decision for me as I grab the robe and put it on.

"Just a second." I say loudly as I tie the belt and pick-up a barking, snarling Jake. "Quiet down, you!"

I notice Bella following me pulling up a pair of the shortest shorts I've ever seen in my life.

"Ungh-uh! Nope." I say shaking my head and pointing back to her bedroom. "Go put on some clothes."

It seems that I was wrong before, it _is_ possible for eyebrows to go higher on a forehead.

"Come on, seriously. If they make us go outside, you want your father to see you on CNN dressed like that?" I soften my tone, hoping to reason with the crazy by throwing down the daddy card.

Thankfully she relents with an annoyed sigh, a stomp off and the slamming of her bedroom door. I'm sure I will hear about it later – it looks like we'll be spending lots of time together today.

Just as I grab the doorknob, they start knocking again, causing Jake to get even crazier in my arms.

I open the door to four men in head-to-toe black gear with assault weapons lowered, but poised to aim if necessary. I motion for them to come in and open the door all the way.

"Sir, we're searching the neighborhood for a suspect. Have you seen anything or anyone in or around the premises?"

I shake my head no. "The only ones here are me and my-" I pause as I try to find the correct word to finish the sentence. _My what? Acquaintance? Friend with benefits? Fuck-buddy?_ I clear my throat. "Uh, me and my girl. She's uh, getting dressed. She'll be out in a minute."

_My girl? What is that all about? _I ask myself as Bella comes out of the bedroom in a hoodie and pajama pants. She's also wearin' a smirk that tells me that she heard me.

Bella takes it from here, answering all the questions he asks as the other officers peek into each room. I don't miss it when they side-eye me on their way out while they try not to snicker at what I'm wearing. I can't even imagine how I look to them with my short little pink robe and petting this tiny tea-cup dog like Dr. Evil and shit. A part of me wants to yell that it was this or a Yankee's jersey, but I think I already look pathetic enough.

She shuts the door quietly and looks at me strangely. I wonder if she's uncomfortable or embarrassed. As if the morning after isn't awkward enough.

"Do you mind if I turn on the TV?" I say, motioning for her remote.

"Uh no, that's probably a good idea."

We sit in silence and watch the coverage as they discuss the events leading up to the citywide lockdown. Bella's leg is bouncing nervously as she watches. After about an hour, she is unable to take any more.

"I'm going to take a shower and then I'll make us some breakfast or brunch or whatever," she says as she pulls at her sleeve nervously. "I, uh. I think I have an extra toothbrush and you can shower when I'm done…if you want."

"Yeah, that'd be great, thanks."

I put Jake down so I can stand up and stretch a bit. I hear her humming as she starts up the water. It's strange how she and I are in our own little bubble. I feel anxious again as I look out her living room window. The streets are now empty. Everyone is looking out their windows, keeping their eyes peeled for any suspicious activity. We're all on our own now. He could be anywhere.

I hear my phone chime with an incoming text. I don't find it remotely surprising that it's my mother urgently requesting that I call her. I notice that she's left six messages and four texts. I need to get this over with so I dial her number. Cue the drama in 3…2…1...

"Hello."

"Hi Ma." I say sheepishly and pull the phone from my ear as she starts in immediately.

"Jesus, Mary and Joseph, Edward! Where are you? I had your neighbor Mrs. Cope bangin' on your door and you don't answer. You're gonna give me and your fath-ah a heart-attack."

"Ma, come on. I'm fine. I crashed at a friend's house." I say as I pinch the bridge of my nose because the sound of her voice is making my head pound again.

"What friend?" You aren't with Emmett and Rosalie. Your sister says she hasn't seen you since Tuesday. Where are you?"

"Don't worry, Ma. I'm safe. Everything is fine." I try to reassure her as I notice Bella coming out of the bathroom. I put my finger over my lips to tell her to keep quiet, but she misses it.

"Shower's all yours." Bella says as she towels her hair.

"Who's that?" Mom asks and I swear to God she has supersonic hearing.

"Nothin' ma, just the TV."

"No. You're watchin' CNN because it sounds like it's in stereo. Edward, who are you with?"

Bella mouths the word _sorry_ to me as it dawns on her that my mom is giving me the third degree.

"What's her name? Is she your girlfriend? Did you meet her at the St. Paul's singles night I told you about?"

"Ma, listen, we aren't supposed to be on the phone. I'm safe and I'll call you once the lockdown is over, alright?"

"Edward, wait. What's her –"

"Bye Ma!" I yell over her and end the call.

Bella is smiling as she comes towards me with a bottle of water and some Tylenol. "Sorry about that, I didn't see that you were on the phone."

"It's alright, no worries. She's just a bit of a ball-buster." I explain with a shrug.

She snorts and drops the pills into my hand. "Trust me, my dad is the same way."

"I can imagine."

The awkwardness subsides for a moment as we eye each other. Most chicks don't look this good in the morning. Even without make-up and her hair soakin' wet, she still looks like a stunner. Those eyes are somethin' else, too. She blushes and looks away.

"I put out some clean towels and a toothbrush for you," she says quickly, nervously twisting a few strands of her hair. "So, if you want to uh," she motions towards the bathroom. "Shower or whatever, you can."

"Thanks Cookie." I say sincerely, heading to the bathroom, not wanting to make her uncomfortable.

The steam and heat from the shower feels wonderful on my skin. I take my time, trying to wrap my head around everything. One-night stands are not my thing. I think Bella may be operating under the assumption that I'm a player of some sort, and if that's the case, I need to rectify that shit real quick. I can only think of one time that I did the whole wham, bam, thank-you ma'am thing when Em and I visited Rosalie at school during our freshman year of college. Drinking too much booze, poor judgment, and Rose and Em placing a sock on the doorknob of her dorm room was the perfect storm for me ending up in Bree Tanner's room. I am not 100% sure, but I think she was Rose's Resident Adviser. I remember the awkward hug in the morning and the promise to keep in touch. I think I avoided calling Rose for weeks, worried that Bree would be in the room wanting to know why I hadn't called.

So far, Bella seems great. Wicked cool, mad sexy, funny and cute as hell. She also has a bit of the crazy vibe, especially with the whole full metal jacket routine with the gun and all. I kinda dig it. I can't get a feel for her though, the girl gives nothing away. Hell, she may be countin' the minutes until she gets me outta her hair for all I know.

I shut off the water and towel off in the shower, careful not to make a mess. It looks like Cookie has a tinge of OCD from the evenly spaced bottles in the shower to the folded edges of her toilet paper. I take a look at myself in her full length mirror as I tie the belt to this ridiculous robe. If Em or Riley could see me now, I'd surely never live it down.

As I step into the kitchen, I see Bella flipping eggs into the frying pan. She grins at me over her shoulder, looking adorable with her hair piled on top of her head and her shorty-shorts back in full effect. Pretty sure I hit the jackpot 'cause she's cooking the eggs in bacon grease, old school like my mom does it.

"Over easy eggs okay with you or do you like scrambled?"

"Over easy is great. You uh, need me to do anything?"

She shakes her head. "Nope, have a seat. Do you want coffee or juice?"

"Coffee sounds good. Just black."

I notice Jake is waiting patiently by his food dish like he's expecting something more than just kibbles and bits.

"It's not Dunkies, but I think it tastes pretty good," she says as she places a large cup of coffee in front of me.

"Thanks."

She's right. It's delicious. And so is she as she works around the kitchen humming and buttering the English muffins. I don't miss it when she bends over and grabs Jake's bowl without bending her knees. God bless those shorts.

"Now Jake, today you get egg whites only and no cheese. Little guys who go potty in the house don't get cheese."

She has her back to us, so she doesn't see it it when I nod and glare condescendingly at her _little guy_. I can't be sure, but I think he raised his paw at me, and possibly flipped me off. I must still be drunk but I feel like justice has been served. _Enjoy your egg whites ya little shit._

"And these are for you." She says and places a full plate of eggs, bacon and English muffins in front of me.

"Wow, this looks amazing."

She shrugs off the compliment and sits down to eat her breakfast. She's got a full plate as well and I am glad to see that she isn't one of those chicks who eats a Triscuit with a dollop of Nutella, calls it a meal and complains about what a pig she is.

We eat breakfast in total silence and just awkwardly smile at each other when we happen to make eye contact. I'm starting to realize that my game is just as weak as Riley's, which is sad 'cause that kid is a stroke.

"I put your clothes in the washer and emptied your pockets. Your wallet and keys are up there." She tells me as she points to the island we defiled last night.

I smirk when I look at the island and remember how she looked spread out for me. I notice that she is trying to hide a shy smile of her own behind her juice glass.

"Thanks for doing that, Cookie. Let me get the dishes."

"Oh no. No, no, no. You sit down. You're my… guest." She says it, but it sounds more like a question.

"Fine, you wash and I'll dry." I tell her bringing my dishes to the sink.

I'm a little disappointed that we work in relative silence as well except for the occasional 'here' and 'thanks' as she hands off the dishes to me.

"So are you a Yankee's fan, too? Like Jake?"

She shakes her head and giggles a bit. "No, my father would disown me. Seriously, it's bad enough that I dated and lived with one for years. If I turned my back on the Sox, my dad would shit twice and die."

"Do you miss New York? Livin' in the city?"

"Nah. I don't know. I was never really into it. Like the first few months it was exciting just learning the city and going out, but eventually it became more of a pain in the ass than anything," she says casually while roughly scraping the egg off the plate she's washing. "Like the commute was excruciating and we didn't have a car. I don't know. I don't like to bitch about it, but Manhattan was always Felix's dream so, you know. I just tried to grin and bear it as long as I could."

"Felix?"

"My ex," she says nodding still focused on that same plate.

"Who names their kid Felix?"

She laughs and rinses the plate before handing it to me. She gets quiet for a minute and I don't want that. I want to keep her talking, to tell me more.

"How long have you been back in Boston?"

"About three months. I just needed a change and had no desire to stay in New York any longer. I didn't want to go back to Bradford so I came here." She pauses slightly as she scrubs her juice glass and huffs. "You know what, I take back my previous statement. There is one thing I miss about New York. I miss Sprinkles cupcakes." I look at her like she is crazy until she continues. "Felix is a physical trainer so we only could have very specific things, no dairy, no bread, no sweets – basically nothing tasty. So every Friday, I'd secretly go to Sprinkles after work and treat myself to one giant cupcake, my one indulgence for the entire week."

She kinda stares off into space like she's reliving some flashback.

"One Friday afternoon, he surprised me at my office so I couldn't have my indulgence for the week. I think that's when I knew that we weren't going to work."

"So wait. You broke up because you couldn't have cupcakes?" I ask confused.

"No," she says a bit flustered. "I think the cupcake was like a metaphor or something. What I wanted was never in the equation. Whenever we spoke about the future it was always about the gym he was going to open, or the race he wanted us to run or whatever he was into that week. When I told him that I'd like to have kids and a house with a yard someday, he kind of blew me off. When it came up again, he went out and bought me Jake to appease me for the time being or something. And I know, I know. I should've spoken up, but I don't know if it would've done any good, ya know?"

I don't know, but I nod my head reassuringly anyway.

"Either way, I am trying to be more uh… assertive these days." She teases and bumps me with her hip trying to lighten the mood as she hands off the juice glass which slips from my grip and crashes to the floor.

"SHIT!" She yells and bends down to clean up the glass before Jake can get into it.

I try to tell her to stop and let me get it, but it's too late. I see the blood and hear her curse before I even have a chance to get down there. She's got blood running down her finger and she looks like she's gonna pass out. Jake is barking and growling as I try to shoo him away from the glass.

"Come here, Cookie." I tell her as I pick her up and place her on the countertop. "Let me see that."

She scoots back onto the counter and shows me her finger. She has a good-size shard hanging out.

"Alright, don't move. Where's your first aid kit?"

"Bathroom. Bottom shelf in the linen closet on the right hand side."

I scoop up Jake and put him in his crate and grab the kit from the bathroom.

"Okay, lemme see." I say as I take her hand in mine and I notice she is trembling. "You squeamish about blood?"

She nods, still looking away. "Distract me. Tell me a story."

"What do ya wanna know?"

"How did you and Rose become such good friends?"

_Great another opportunity for me to look like a pussy._

"We met in eighth grade. It was after school and she was waiting for her ride. Royce King was messin' with her, tryin' to look up her skirt or something perverted. Either way, I was feelin' froggy so I stepped to him, threw a punch and missed." I say as I clean around the wound, trying to get a good look at it. "He threw a punch too, caught me in the mouth." I tell her with a chuckle. "So there I am on the ground, lip all swollen and shit. Next thing I know, Royce is lying right next to me holdin' his eye, bawling his face off."

"Did Emmett punch him?"

"Nope. Em didn't come into the picture until our junior year." I explain as I pull the tweezers from the kit. "Rose dropped him with one punch. It was awesome. She helped me up, dusted me off, and taught me to throw a punch later that week. We've been best friends ever since."

She's watching me closely, smiling and wincing at the same time. "Uh, how did Rose and Emmett hook-up?"

"Take a deep breath for me on three, Cookie." I say as I grab the shard with the tweezers. "One… two… three." She sucks the air between her teeth as I pull out the glass. "You alright?"

"Yeah," she nods and bites her lip.

"When Rose and I were juniors, Rose decided that Royce wasn't a douche-bag anymore and dated him." I shake my head and roll my eyes 'cause it still aggravates me to this day that she didn't listen to me. "I'd like the record to show that I didn't approve. He got rough with her at a party, I don't know. I wasn't there. But Em was and he put that kid in the hospital."

"Aww, so it was like love at first sight?"

"Uhhhh…. No." I say with a laugh. "This is gonna sting a bit." I tell her as I clean the wound itself. "He chased her for six months before she agreed to go on a date with him. He's a year younger than us and she thought she was too cool. But she came around, eventually."

I work in silence for the next few minutes as I place the gauze on the cut and wrap the bandage around it. I can feel her eyes on me and I see her tongue running back and forth on her bottom lip. I wet mine too just in case.

"You're really good at that." She says, just above a whisper.

I meet her eyes with a crooked smirk and lift the tip of her injured finger to my lips, before pecking it softly.

"I'm good at a lot of things, Cookie."

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**A/N: Will they or won't they? How long and how far will I take the awkwardness? Your guess is as good as mine, pals.**

**Don't forget to check out my pal Blueissoul's take on the article in her hot fic _One Night Stand in Lock-down London_. Not for nuthin', dolls – but her cocky Londonward has some serious panty ruining potential. **

**Tonight, instead of our usual Let It WIP recs, I am going to give a shout out to some new authors who are popping their fanfic writing cherry. I had a wonderful experience as a first-time writer in the fandom and I would love it if you guys would help me pay it forward by supporting and encouraging the talents of these new fanfic writers. **

**Who knows, these new authors may someday be your old faves. Without further ado, here are the Like A Virgin fic recs:**

_**All The Mistakes**_** – bpik  
**_**Dress You Up**_** – MazzyStarla  
**_**Where I Belong**_** – cravingMOREplz**

**Thanks so much to everyone who has read, reviewed, followed fav'd, pimped, tweeted, and lurked this fic! I appreciate it so much! See you all next Thursday.**


	4. Chapter 4 - Delirium

**Rating: M**

**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyers owns all things Twilight - I just like to get weird with her characters.  
****Thanks to LovinRob for beta'ing – she smacked it up, flipped it and rubbed it down.  
****Thanks to Carrie ZM for doin' me… the honor of pre-reading this crazy fic.  
****Thanks to AmandaC3 for the fantastic banner.  
****And to the Triangle of Curls Girls for all of the encouragement.**

* * *

**Don't forget to drop your R's  
****and keep practicing your Boston accent.**

* * *

**Chapter 4 - Delirium**

April 19, 2013  
11:30 AM EDT  
Boston, MA

_I meet her eyes with a crooked smirk and lift the tip of her injured finger to my lips, before pecking it softly._

"_I'm good at a lot of things, Cookie."_

"Yes, you are," she muses quietly with her eyes on my lips. I'm guessin' she's remembering how my mouth felt all over her body last night.

Still holding her hand I bring it to my chest, pulling her closer to me. The small tilt of her head and the slight part of her lips is all the invitation I need. I go for it, placing my mouth on hers. What starts as a small peck turns into a full on frenzy as we find ourselves in a very familiar position on the counter. Bella wraps her legs around my waist and pulls me forward until my center is pressing against her tightly. I groan into her mouth when she pulls the tie on the robe and grips my dick.

"I'm good at a lot of things, too," she murmurs softly against my jaw as she starts jerking my shaft slowly.

I brace myself against the counter, leaning my forehead against hers as we watch her work me over. She alternates between a firm hold and a feather-light touch. It's fuckin' maddening and she knows it. I hiss when she trails her injured hand down my stomach and scratches the sensitive skin near my thigh.

"Does that feel good, Edward?" She asks in a baby soft voice as she grins, obviously pleased with the effect she has on me.

She works her thumb over the head as I nod and watch. I start to gently slip my hands higher and higher on her thighs until my finger tips descend under her shorts. I let them linger there, enjoying how her soft pants quickly turn into quiet whimpers. The thin fabric of her tank top is now molded to her chest, her nipples hardening right before my eyes.

"You turned on, Cookie?" I smile against her shoulder and reach up to lower the thin strap. I feel her nod as I run my tongue across her collarbone. I just need for her to say the words. "Tell me what you want."

But she doesn't tell because that's not her style. Instead, she smashes her lips to mine and grinds her center against my erection. She's kissing me crazy and I am doing everything I can to hold my own against her intensity. And just as it's getting good, Judas Priest interrupts our foray into foreplay with a rousing live rendition of 'Breakin' the Law'.

"Shit!" she grumbles against my lips and pulls back.

"Just ignore it. Call 'em later." I plead against her throat as I lower my hands down her chest hoping that she is still down for round two.

"I can't," she says unconvincingly as she holds my head to her neck. "It's my dad. If I don't answer, he will probably send over a few of his police buddies to do a well check on me."

I seem to recall that her father is in law enforcement. The last thing I need is any more boys in blue to see me looking all pretty in pink so I help her off the counter and start cleaning up the glass.

"Hi dad," she says sheepishly like he just caught her getting to first base with a boy on the kitchen counter.

"_Yes, they were here."_

"_No, I didn't tell them that I was Charlie Swan's daughter."_

"_I doubt they'd remember the time your case was on America's Most Wanted. I don't even think that show is on the air anymore."_

"_I know Dad, the case made national headlines."_

"_Yes, I loaded it."_

_Her voice rises, laced with irritation. "Yes Dad, the safety is on."_

I glance and smirk at her as I place some of the larger glass shards in the garbage can. She responds in kind by rolling her eyes and miming blowing her brains out with her fingers.

"_Uh, yeah, he's right here."_

I panic because there is an off chance that Bella is one of those psychos who calls their parents after knocking boots.

"_Jake, come say hi to Grandpa Charlie."_

And I'll be damned if that dog doesn't trot his rotten ass over to her to sniff and bark into the phone she's holding out to him.

"_Alright dad, I need to get some work done around here. Is there anything else you need?"_

"_Nope."_

"_Truly I haven't."_

"_No, I haven't heard from Felix this week."_

My ears perk up at the mention of her ex-boyfriend's name, but more importantly at the unmistakable annoyance I hear in her voice. I eye her from behind the island, watching as she cradles the phone on her shoulder and straightens a picture on her bookcase.

"_How's Sue?"_

"_Don't play dumb. Alice's mom told her she ran into you guys at mass."_

"_Oh really? How convenient," she says, dragging it out like the Church Lady from Saturday Night Live. "Interesting how you are just now calling me mid-morning. Where have you been? We've been on lockdown for hours."_

She realizes her error the minute she says it and tries to do damage control.

"_And by we, I mean Jake and I... and the city of Boston... because we're all on lockdown."_

"_Yeah, alright, I will."_

"_Love you too, Dad."_

"_Bye."_

She ends the call and slumps into a chair at the table.

"Sorry about that. My dad is kind-of…over-protective," she says, sounding embarrassed.

_Looks like Daddy killed the mood._

"Where's your vacuum?"

"Uh, hall closet. I can do that, you don't have to." She tells me getting up.

"Nah, sit down. I got it."

I vacuum up the glass as Jake and Bella look on in amusement.

"Something funny?" I ask as I bend over to wrap up the cord.

She nods and points at me up and down.

"I should snap a picture of this. It's like mommy-porn. A hot guy in a pink robe, vacuuming. Chicks would love it. You could do a calendar. I'll bet you Riley would buy it."

_She's got jokes._ "Careful Cookie, or I won't do the dishes."

* * *

After I do the dishes, we make our way back to the living room. The silence is back, but it's somehow less awkward. I flip through the news stations only to see more of the same images and speculation. The suspects face fills the screen every 2-3 minutes. Bella watches with me for about thirty minutes before she grabs her iPad and curls up in the corner of the couch. And Jake is eye-ballin' me from his little perch on top of the chair. I think about taking a nap when I hear Bella grumble.

"Jesus, Alice."

Bella is shaking her head, huffing and rolling her eyes every now and again. I find myself watching her in my periphery. She's far more entertaining than watching the lockdown coverage and I welcome the distraction.

"What's got ya worked up over there, Cookie?"

She looks over at me, chewing her nail nervously. "I don't know what a lot of this shit is. How am I supposed to know what I should get?"

"Here, lemme' see." I say, taking the opportunity to scoot closer to her as I grab the iPad and read the screen. "Ah, baby shower, huh?"

"Yeah. My friend Alice is having a baby. Her friends in Texas are throwing her a shower next weekend."

"Is she having multiples?" I ask as I scroll through the twelve page registry.

She snorts and shakes her head. "No. Alice is just as clueless as I am about the whole kid thing. I'm pretty sure she just took that _What to Expect_ book's advice and registered for the entire goddamn store," she leans in and reads over my shoulder. "I think I should get the _My Breast Friend_ pillow just because I like the name."

"Nah, here's what you want to get." I tell her as I make my selection. "The Baby Einstein Company calls it an 'Exersaucer', but Uncle Edward calls it 'solitary confinement'. Trust me; she will be thanking you once the little one is mobile."

"You're an uncle?" She asks as I hand her back the tablet.

"Yep. I've got two nephews, Liam and Connor. One's good, one's hood, but I love 'em both like crazy."

"I'm supposed to send some sort of parenting advice as well. Got any sage advice for me, _Uncle Edward?"_

"Yeah," I say putting my hands behind my head and stretching my legs. "Time out works, but three smacks works faster."

She laughs and types it in before I can tell her that I was just kidding. "That's perfect!" she says still laughing.

She then proceeds to tell me about her friend Alice. Seems they met at St. John Fisher College in upstate New York. I can practically hear my mom squeal that I'm interested in a girl from her alma mater. Bella talks about Alice's husband Jasper and how they met him during their spring break at South Padre Island. Bella alleges that Alice went missing for days, barely making it to the airport for the return home but as Alice sees it, Bella was intoxicated from the minute they set foot on South Padre soil so she couldn't possibly remember anything that happened. This couple sounds hilarious as Jasper is a rancher in Texas and his wife is a true blue Boston Proper girl. She jokes about the accent their little one will have when he or she grows up. We take turns trying out the Boston/Texas accent and agree that it may be the worst hybrid-accent in the continental U.S.

After a while the conversation fades and we go back to watching the lockdown coverage. Before I know it, Bella is fast asleep, snoring softly. I notice Jake is antsy and pacing by the door, practically crossing his legs.

"Come on, let's go." I tell him as I get up to take him out.

I make sure my robe is tied tight before we head outside so I don't give the neighbors a show. We hit the backyard, and Jake runs out to the middle to relieve himself near a tree. I am literally freezing my balls off as the breeze blows the robe up in the back. I call for Jake to come, but the little shit decides to lie down at the very end of the property.

"Jake, come on. Let's go in." I whisper yell, hoping that I don't draw attention to myself in my girly get-up.

The little fucker rolls over, and I swear his lips curl into a smile as he suns himself. I see Bella's neighbor is eyein' me out his window. I throw him a friendly wave and point to the dog as if to say 'what a pain in the ass this guy is'. Old Man Withers just shakes his head disapprovingly. When he leaves the window, I turn back to Jake.

"Get up here, ya little shit!" I tell him through my teeth and point to the door so he knows I mean business. When he blatantly ignores me and starts licking his balls, I know what I've gotta do. "Fine, I'll be inside, nailin' your girl."

I almost hump the air at him again, but think better of it when I see him jump up like he's gonna step to me. He trots over all cocky like he's won, although by my count we're tied.

We reenter the apartment, and Jake heads right to his perch so he can mean mug me from every direction in the apartment. I pace a bit, looking out the windows at the eerily empty streets. Thinking about how the suspect is still on the loose unnerves me. I glance at the television, and of course, his face is still all over the screen as the coverage continues.

Bella has floor to ceiling bookshelves against her far wall filled with books and picture frames. I check to see that she's still sleeping as I am about to do some hardcore reconnaissance. She's still in the same position so I know the coast is clear.

It appears her OCD doesn't end at the bathroom. She has her books in sections by category. I run my fingers over the spines of her travel section, noting the books are about places that I'd love to see in my lifetime. Her classics section is huge, and I notice that the books are all well-worn. I chuckle a bit when I check out the titles in her "how-to" books. Looks like Cookie is a bit of a do-it yourselfer.

I hear her stir a bit so I return to the couch, not wanting her to catch me snooping. She must be aware of me because as soon as I sit down, she rests her feet across my lap and continues to sleep soundly, grinding her teeth every now and again. Wanting to make sure that there will be no funny business, Jake hops onto the arm of the couch right next to me. He plops down and raises a brow, daring me to put the moves on her.

I see there are a couple of photo albums under the coffee table and reach down to grab them. The first one is small with Jake's name across it in sparkly blue letters. The first picture is of Jake as a puppy. He looks tiny as she hugs him against her face. The next shot is of Jake in a raincoat with matching boots. I laugh because he looks pissed. I turn the page, and then I'm pissed because it's a picture of Jake and Felix in Yankee shirts. Only Felix isn't chubby, he's fuckin' monstrous. He's huge with muscles on top of muscles. His neck is thicker than my chest.

"What the fuck?" I mutter and look at Jake as I suddenly feel like a scrawny piece of shit.

The next shot is a picture of Bella, Jake and Felix at a beach. Bella looks tiny resting atop his shoulders as Jake looks on. I mean, this kid's got a fuckin' thirty pack. His arms and chest are thick, muscles bulging everywhere. It's like he's mocking my barely there pecks and abs.

"You've gotta be kidding me." I say to Jake, like he's going to confirm for me that 'yes, even his dick has abs'.

I shut that book and move on to the larger album. The first few pages are of Bella and a man with a giant Lorax looking mustache. I can only assume he is her father because she has his eyes. There are shots of them fishing, boating and even at a gun range. Cookie isn't kidding; she is the best son he ever had.

The next few pages are of Bella and a woman who shares her petite frame and smile. There are lots of pictures of them on the beach and in the sand. I think Jake notices that I linger a little longer on these shots since Bella is wearing a bikini that leaves little to the imagination.

The following few pages are of Bella and a pint-sized brunette. It looks like they went back-packing through Europe. There are pictures of them all over the continent. A shot where they are hugging each other in front of the Eiffel Tower with matching berets. Another where they are standing knee deep in the water of the Trevi Fountain. Cookie toasting the camera as she smiles drunkenly in an English pub.

The next few pages of pictures are of Bella being adventurous. Soaking wet in her white-water rafting gear. One with her nervously smiling crossing her arms over her chest as she gets ready to bungee jump off of a bridge. Several blurry shots of her paddle-boarding in the ocean.

With every image I can feel myself wanting her more. She's one of those people who seizes the moment, does the things that most people set aside for _someday_ – including me. Rose is always bustin' my balls, telling me to get out there, do something crazy other than existing. Maybe she's right. Maybe I merely exist. Maybe I should get out there and live… like Bella does. I shake my head at myself as I get carried away with these thoughts of having a life like hers. _Or a life with her_.

The last page of the album has pictures of her, Rose and Em. She and Rose are wearing matching Bruins jerseys and drunken smiles. Another picture is of Cookie with Em in a headlock. It's really not that hard to imagine her in my life. I shut the album, not wanting to entertain the fantasy any more than necessary when a familiar tune comes from the television. It's that Sarah McLachlan song "Angel". I look up to see that it is that ASPCA commercial about animal cruelty. The one that makes you feel sick for sharing the same genetic make-up as the scumbags who hurt defenseless animals. I want to turn away, or turn it off. Commercials shouldn't make grown men want to bawl their face off.

I notice Jake watching me closely, like he knows that I can't make my eyes look at the screen any longer. I suddenly feel guilty, like I owe Jake some sort of apology. I swallow thickly and clear my throat.

"I'm, uh. I'm sorry that I humped the air at you," I tell him sincerely. "That's rude and you don't deserve that."

Obviously, I don't expect him to tell me that he is sorry for shitting in my cap or pissing on my clothes. But just like Cookie, this dog never does what I expect as he lays his head on my lap and closes his eyes. I pet his head and watch the news for a bit before I also succumb to sleep.

* * *

Bella's legs move over my lap and I open my eyes. I am a bit groggy as I glance over at her. She's reading her iPad intently with that bottom lip tucked firmly under her teeth. I tap her leg twice to let me up so I can relieve myself.

As I am in the bathroom, I hear her get up and put my clothes in the dryer. I take my time tying the robe back up and look out the window for signs of the suspect.

When I return, she's back to reading and completely oblivious to the fact that I am even in the room. Her legs are stretched across the couch, crossed at the ankles. She's rubbing her thighs together and clenching them every now and again. I grab her ankles and place them back on my lap as I sit down.

"What'cha readin', Cookie?"

She lowers her iPad momentarily to eye me warily. "Uh. _Pride and Prejudice_. It's my favorite."

I smile and nod, pretending that I believe her. She doesn't know I saw her tattered and dog-eared copy on the bookshelf. I turn back to the TV to see if there are any updates on the suspect, unfortunately it's more of the same. I start to zone out again when Bella starts shifting in her seat, sliding her hand over her thigh and smoothing out her shorts. Her fingers linger a little too long.

_Hmmm…. I wonder._

"Mr. Darcy likes to give her that 'D', yeah?"

Bella nods and confirms my suspicions with an absentminded 'uh-huh'. She realizes her mistake as I reach for the iPad to see what has my Cookie all hot and bothered. I jump up, trying to get a good look at it as Bella frantically claws at me while she reaches for it.

_Holy shit. _Bella is reading some seriously smutty stuff.

"I didn't know that Mr. Darcy's first name is Deuce," I say through a laugh noticing the flush of embarrassment on her cheeks. "Looks like Deuce Darcy is a bit of a dirty talker, huh?"

"Oh my God!" She shrieks as she chases me into her bedroom. "Give it back!"

"I'm sure that Elizabeth Bennett will be pissed that he's bangin' this Eva chick."

"Edward!" She whines and pouts as she makes another grab for her tablet.

I shut the bedroom door behind her and gently toss her iPad on the bed. Before she can lunge for it, I grab her around the middle and turn her so we are facing the mirror on the back of her door. A faint blush colors her heaving chest as she stares daggers back at me in our reflection. Her expression softens though when I sweep her hair to one side and place small kisses along her neck and jaw. Her eyes darken as her lips part, releasing a soft breath. Relaxing my grip on her waist, I slide my finger up her body and place it over her lips before she distracts me.

"Sshh," I murmur near her ear and raise her arms just above her head, positioning her hands against the door. "Don't talk, Cookie."

Slowly, I skim my fingertips down her throat and chest watching the bumps on her skin rise in their wake. Once I reach the neckline of her tank, I pause briefly and smirk at her before pulling it down to expose her tits. Her nipples harden instantly, and I can't stop myself from taking one between my thumb and forefinger, tweaking them over and over until she is whimpering and writhing against me.

"That feels so…" she starts, but I cover her lips with my fingers and gently bite down on her shoulder.

"I said no talking, Cookie." I remind her. My words come out harshly against her neck. "Don't make a sound."

She arches her back and rubs her ass against my straining erection, begging for some kind of friction. Her eyes plead as she watches my hand sink lower and lower down her body until it disappears into the front of her shorts. A shudder rips through her body as I press roughly against her pussy.

"Just watch."

* * *

**A/N: Oh Mylanta! I cockblocked you all twice in one chapter. Gawd I am kind of a dick. But no worries dolls, I will make it up to you next chapter. *LovinRob and Carrie ZM nod enthusiastically.***

**The Deuce and Eva mentioned in this chapter are characters from a disturbingly hot series of books by Madeline Sheehan. She is a close, personal friend of my pal and fellow Triangle of Curls Girl, Heather Maven. If you are looking for an UNBELIEVABLY steamy read with mature themes and biker boys, make sure to check out her books, **_**Undeniable**_** and **_**Unbeautifully**_** available on Amazon.**

**Alright, now it's time to Let It WIP! **

**A Talionic Force by LovinRob – Get in early on this one dolls, there is a teaser posted on and it begins posting at midnight tonight. This story will have it all - a who-done-it with plot-twists and a DELICIOUSLY dirty, cocky Edward. **

**Down Home by MrsSpaceCowboy - *Carrie ZM squeals and jumpy claps* This here is a ****hot and sticky-sweet Southern story about life, family and finding love in the one place you can always come back to. From the author that gave us **_**The Give Away Girl**_** – this one is not to be missed, dolls!**

**If you haven't already, make sure to check out Blueissoul's take on the Esquire article **_**One Night Stand in Locked-down London. **_**Cockyward, Crazyella, and killer… chemistry. **

**Thanks to everyone who is reading, reviewing, following, fav'ing, rec'ing, pimping, tweeting and/or lurking this fic. See you next Thursday!**


	5. Chapter 5 - Bewilderment

**Rating: M**

**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyers owns all things Twilight - I just like to get weird with her characters.**

**Thanks to LovinRob for beta'ing – she smacked it up, flipped it and rubbed it down.  
****Thanks to Carrie ZM for doin' me… the honor of pre-reading this crazy fic.  
****Thanks to AmandaC3 for the fantastic banner.  
And to the Triangle of Curls Girls for all of the encouragement.**

* * *

**Make sure to let your Inner Affleck, Damon and Walberg do the talking with **  
**their amazing** **Boston accent.**

* * *

**Chapter 5 - Bewilderment**

April 19, 2013  
4:15 PM EDT  
Boston, MA

"_I said no talking, Cookie." I remind her. My words come out harshly against her neck. "Don't even make a sound."_

_She arches her back and rubs her ass against my straining erection in response, begging me for some kind of friction. Her eyes plead as she watches my hand sink lower and lower down her body until it disappears into the front of her shorts. A shudder rips through her body as I press roughly against her pussy._

"_Just watch."_

The room is fairly dark around us. The sunlight is barely filtering in through the partially closed blinds. The only sounds heard are the choppy pants from Bella's parted lips and the scrapping of my fingers against her panties as I rub her slit furiously. I watch her in the reflection as she looks back at me from beneath her lashes. The slightest circle of her hips causes her to slip, whispering a quiet 'fuck'. I remember the filthy words that made her so wet in the first place and smile as place my lips against her ear.

"You like to watch, don't you Bella?" I ask and immediately feel her body stiffen. "Does that make this hotter? Hmm?" I taunt while pushing two fingers inside of her as far as they will go. "Do you like to watch me finger fuck that pretty little pussy of yours?" I feel her walls clench as I pull in and out slowly with long exaggerated strokes. "Or is it the dirty words that are gettin' you hot?"

A soft, traitorous mewl escapes her throat before she can suck in her lips. She's struggling not to react to my words and failing miserably. I've almost got her right where I want her which is panting and pleading beneath me, taking all I have to give and begging me for more. She's rolling her hips, tryin' to get me to work that clit. But I won't. Not until she asks. Reaching across her body, I cup her other tit and tweak and turn her peak. Her hands are flattening and clenching into fists against the door as that careful control slips further away.

"Tell me what you want, Cookie." I murmur against her shoulder before pressing long open mouth kisses across her collarbone, and watching for her reaction.

"Oh God…" she whines when I finally press two fingers where she wants me the most.

"You want me to make you feel good?"

She nods fervently, and pushes her chest further into my hand and her ass and lower back into my dick.

"Then ya gotta tell me what'cha want." I pinch and tug at her nipple, trying to get a reaction out of her. "Just say the words."

"Inside me." She breathes quietly before quickly clearing her throat. "I want you inside of me." She annunciates with more confidence, clearly and slowly.

I smile out the side of my mouth, clearly victorious. I can't stop myself from teasing her just once more.

"Where do ya want me inside of you? Huh? You want me here?" I ask circling my fingers inside of her and pumping them deeply. "Or how about here?" I suggest removing my fingers from her and rubbing them over her lips. "Which one?"

This girl. She doesn't miss a fuckin' beat, turnin' the tables on me instantly just when I thought I was runnin' this show.

"Both."

"Both, huh?" I say with a small chuckle as I untie the robe and let it drop to the floor. "You got it, _sweethaht. _Where are the condoms?"

She jerks her chin at the nightstand near her bed. And just as I turn to go grab one, I have a thought. I take one of her hands from the wall and drag it down her body to replace mine in her panties.

"Keep workin' that for me." I tell her as I walk away.

I pull open her nightstand drawer, and the first thing I see are a couple of vibrators. I feel the perve and sick fuck in me do a two-handed high five followed up by a mid-air chest bump. My horny high quickly dies though when I see a triathlon ribbon, reminding me she used to be with Mr. Universe.

I grab a condom and decide a little pep talk is in order as I shut the drawer. Her eyes are on mine from across the room in the reflection of her mirror. One hand holding herself up and one hand working herself over. She's doing that for _me_. She wants _me_. It's _mine_ for the taking. And what I lack in cock abs, I will make up for in pure, fucking crazy.

I sit on the bed with my back against the headboard and watch her watching me. Stroking myself every now and again, needing to relieve the ache.

"Come here, Cookie."

And she does. She walks right over, standing at the foot of the bed and starts stripping off her clothes. The smile on her face is knowing and smug as she climbs on the bed, crawling between my legs on all fours and then she… stops. Leaning forward I go to kiss her, but she quickly lowers her head to kiss me somewhere else.

I grunt loudly as she wraps her lips around my cock and runs her tongue over the head. She eyes me, obviously enjoying my reaction as she takes more and more of me in. Rubbing small circles on my thighs, she catches me off guard again when she reaches around and pulls me further into her mouth. I don't even think I do it consciously, but the next thing I know my hands are on the back of her head and in her hair, setting a quick pace for her. And I watch. I watch as she takes me into her warm mouth over and over. Humming and running her teeth every now and again.

Now as much as the thought of blowing my load in her mouth excites me, the thought of her thrashing and moaning in pleasure beneath me is far more appealing.

"Come here." I tell her pulling her off me.

She kisses me full on the lips, and the kiss is so hot I choose to forget she just had my dick in her mouth. We're a hot mess of hands pulling on hair and tongues and teeth. We're each pushing against the other, desperate to take control.

"Lie down." I growl against her cheek and soften it with a peck to her lips.

"No," she challenges with a whisper and presses her mouth to mine again.

_Of course she won't. _Looks like I'm going to have to handle this a little differently I think to myself as I flip her over onto her back.

"That's bett-ah," I say as I tear open the condom. "Now stay put."

She leans up on her elbows, watching me intently and positioning herself. She's scooting higher and higher on the bed and spreads her legs. She looks fucking gorgeous with her hair and eyes wild, biting that lip of hers. There's just _one_ thing that will make it perfect. I grab her hands and wrap them around the headboard slats.

"Hang on, Cookie." I warn her against her lips and place myself at her entrance.

She whimpers softly, rocking against me. And then I am inside of her as deep as I can go and her legs are around my waist pulling me in further. Arching her back and rolling her hips, she gives as good as she gets meeting me thrust for thrust.

Gripping her hips I steady her, pounding relentlessly while I mutter crazy things into her neck about how good her pussy feels and questionable compliments on how well she takes my cock. For a second, I worry that she's going to be disgusted by the perverted shit I am spewing right now, but her breathy string of muttered obscenities say otherwise. The next thing I know her hands are off the slats and firmly clenching my ass cheeks.

"Unggh, harder!" She pleads with her eyes closed and head thrown back. "Please. Just…" she starts before clawing at my backside and grinding beneath me. "Fuck me!"

I don't even think she has the 'me' completely out of her mouth before I have her ankles resting on my shoulders and her hands gathered in mine above her head.

"Fuuuckkkk!" I groan as I plunge deep inside of her.

We're both watching as I disappear into her over and over again. Driving forcefully, our skin slaps loudly with each powerful thrust. My grip on her hands tightens with each movement, holding her steady beneath me.

"Almost," she pants, her eyes meeting mine.

I feel her entire body tense before she begins to tremble slightly. I know I only have about three thrusts left in me, so I need to make them count. I lock my mouth on hers, savoring and silencing her screams. I fight the urge to close my eyes because I want to see her. I want to see every shiver, every shake, every single ounce of pleasure that_ I_ give her. Her body locks as her walls squeeze my cock, and that's all it takes to blow my ever lovin' mind. She kisses me deeply as we both start to come down, extending the high and heightening the connection we feel. Or I feel. When I collapse onto the bed, I pull her tightly to me, still craving her closeness.

"That was…" she starts but doesn't complete her thought aloud.

"Fuckin' incredible." I finish for her, needing her to know that I've never experienced anything like that. Ever.

She shakes her head against my chest, I can feel her smiling. "You say that to all the girls."

I huff and put my arms behind my head. I really try not to be insulted by her remark. I do. And I try to keep my mouth shut and blow it off when she notices my change in demeanor. But I can't.

"Lemme ask you somethin'," I say, staring at the ceiling not wanting to meet her eyes for the first time since the first moment I met her.

"Shoot."

"You seem to be operatin' under the assumption that I am big on hittin' it and quittin' it."

"That's not a question."

"Fine. Do you? Ya know, think that… about me?"

She props her head on her elbow and her brow is furrowed as she studies me closely. Here I am expecting her to ease my mind and tell me 'no, no, no'. Instead she just shrugs which might as well be code for 'yes, I think you'd stick your dick in just about anything with a pulse'.

"Well why?"

"Why what?"

"Why do you think that?"

"Rose said you don't date."

"And." I say a bit curtly because I knew Rose was behind this.

"And then Vicky kind-of mentioned that you said you 'don't do relationships'," she clarifies with air quotes and it all makes sense.

"Ah Vicky," I say as I shake my head and smirk when I think about Rose's last attempt at setting me up. "I did say that to her. She's not lying." I can't gauge her reaction so I explain. "Rose set me up on a date with her a few years ago when they first started working together. It was brutal. I mean, like she is one shit fit away from an episode of _Snapped."_

I feel extremely relieved when she nods knowingly, but I feel the need to let her know the level of crazy that Vicky is capable of.

"Like the day after our very awkward date, she showed up at the station with food, asking me what the guys like to eat and talking about free weekends to visit the Cape. Just fuckin' looney tunes." I explain hoping that she'll understand. "So I told her that she was a nice girl, but I don't do relationships. I know I look like a dick for not being honest, but if I said 'sorry Vick, but you're a fruitcake' she'd make a skin suit out of me."

Bella bursts into laughter and mocks my pain with her best Buffalo Bill impersonation. "It puts the lotion on its body."

As happy as I am that she knows the truth, I want to make sure she believes it.

"I'm not like that. I promise." I say quietly.

She nods and snuggles into my side. We talk about everything and nothing. We exchange family stories, and I learn that the Chief is on equal footing with my mother in the meddling department. She tells me all about her travels and all the places she has been and things she has yet to see.

"Do you like to travel?" She asks.

"I'd like to."

"You haven't."

"I mean, here and there. I've hit all the hot spots in the US, but nothing abroad unless you count a day on the Canadian side of Niagara Falls."

"Well, why don't you?" She asks seriously.

"I have no idea," I answer honestly, wondering what holds me back. "I mean there are a lot of things I want to do and see, crazy things I want to experience like Amazing Race style. I guess I've never been one to get up and go for it, you know." She nods with an odd expression on her face and I hope she doesn't think I'm a lazy bum so I try to recover. "But I'd like to be someone like that."

We talk at length about Rose and Em and their struggle to get pregnant. After years of trying, they are going to see a fertility specialist next week. Rose has an excellent poker face, but it guts me to watch my best friend's heart break month after month. The conversation hits a lull on that sad note and before long I feel her relax into me once more for another lazy nap.

* * *

When I wake I notice she's no longer right next to me, but at the foot of the bed wearing my robe. I mean _her_ robe. I am not sure how long we slept, but it must have been a while since my clothes are dry and folded neatly on her dresser.

"I'm sorry if I woke you, I had to let out Jake," she says quietly, slipping off the robe and climbing back into bed.

"Did the old man from '_Up_' stare you down too?"

She snorts. "You must be talking about Mrs. Newton. And of course she did."

"No fuckin' way. That's a woman?" I say in shock watching her double over in a fit of giggles.

"So are you like a big Disney fan? Most guys wouldn't reference the old man from '_Up_' in normal conversation."

"Most guys wouldn't, but Uncle Edward would. I take my sister's kids overnight a few times a month just to give her a break. I know all the Disney movies _and_ their running times. And I'll have you know that '_Up_' is 86 minutes of awesome and silence."

She listens and laughs as I tell her about my misadventures in babysitting like the time that Liam was 3 years-old and brought me his poop to show me he actually went potty. And then I tell her about the time my old neighbor was having a yard sale, and I told Connor it was just a bunch of junk.

"I turn around for one minute and the next thing I know he's over talking to the neighbor who's handing him this ratty ass stuffed animal. When I go to grab it and give it back, Connor yells for me to 'Quit touching his junk'. It was fuckin' mortifying."

We laugh for a bit, and I tell her a few more stories before I notice that it's almost 6:00 pm. It dawns on me that it's getting late and we're still on lockdown and for the first time, I worry that this guy is already long gone.

"Any news on the suspect?"

"I haven't looked," she says with a shrug and tosses me my shirt. "Get dressed. I'm going to start dinner."

"What? You don't like me walkin' around in a short pink robe, tea-baggin' all your furniture every time I sit down?"

She snickers and rolls her eyes and throws my pants and boxers. "Cover 'em up!"

* * *

"What do you want to eat?" She asks as she stands in front of the fridge, running her finger along her bottom lip.

"Whatever. I can cook if you want." I offer but inside I am chanting '_please say no, please say no' _over and over.

"No way, you're a guest," she says as she opens the freezer.

We decide on a frozen pizza, and I am secretly thrilled that it isn't one of those three cheese jobs. It's a bit too soon to have the lactose discussion. I talk her into eating on the couch so we can watch the lockdown coverage. When we sit down to eat, her legs immediately move to my lap and Jake jumps up to lie there as well with his head resting on Bella's ankle.

We watch in comfortable silence as the governor lifts the lockdown ban while warning that the suspect is still at large. I look to gauge Bella's reaction to this news, but she just continues to stare at the screen expressionless. The silence grows awkward at this new development or at least it does for me. Technically we are no longer on lockdown. Do I leave? Will I look like a pussy if I stay because the suspect is still at large?

"Lockdown is over, Jake," she says patting him on his head before looking at me with a sad smile. "Edward probably wants to get home."

I can't read her. Is that an out for me so I don't give her the old _'last night was beautiful'_ speech? Or is that her subtle way of saying _'get the fuck out creeper'_?

"Uh, yeah. I can get out of your hair if you want." I say gathering up my napkin and water bottle to take to the kitchen.

"Oh no. I didn't mean it like that. I just thought that you, uh, you know," she stutters a bit as she back-peddles and wrings her hands nervously. "You may have somewhere to be or things you wanted to get done today or something like that." She shakes her head and places her hand on my arm. "You are more than welcome to stick around if you want. I mean the guy is still at large. It's not really safe out there."

Her voice is so reassuring and sincere that I know she wants me here. So I'll stay, because I know without a doubt that I want to be here – with her.

"I'll stay for a bit." I tell her quietly.

"Good," she says sounding relieved. "I mean I can totally drive you home when you want because getting a cab will be a pain in the ass and the buses will be so full that they'll smell like swass and…"

I cut her off with a kiss because for the first time I can tell that this attraction may not be one-sided or strictly physical or just a one-night thing.

She leans into me, deepening the kiss when I feel Jake make off with my piece of pizza. It's a small price to pay for this. We kiss for awhile and then spend the next couple of hours going through her photo albums. I act like it's the first time I am seeing the pictures, and I can feel Jake looking at me like little Arnold Drummond asking '_wha'chu talkin' about Willis_'. She tells the stories behind each picture and her experiences are far better than I imagined.

"You want anything to drink?" She yells from the kitchen when I see Jake prancing around needing to go out again.

"No, I'm good. I'll be right back. I'm going to take Jake out."

He runs out to do his business when I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket.

"Hello."

"Hey."

"Hey Rose."

"You home yet?"

"Nope."

"Still at Bella's?"

"Yeah."

"You like her, huh?"

"Yeah."

And it's true. I do.

"She'll be good for you," she says like she knew it all along. "But you gotta take her out on a real date. A nice dinner, maybe to a club." She starts in on me just like my mother would. "Or you can take her to play paintball. Ya gonna lose though because she's got great aim, and she's wicked smaht with strategy."

I laugh because that doesn't surprise me at all.

"True story," she continues excitedly. "We went to play paintball with our coworkers. It was some kind of team building activity or something. Anyway, she came out of nowhere on Vicky and lit her up Scarface style. Vicky was all cryin' and shit. It was crazy funny."

"Paintball, huh? I'll keep that in mind." I tell her as I motion for Jake to come inside. "I gotta get back inside, I'll call ya tomorrow."

When Jake and I walk in, I see Bella standing near the TV watching and listening intently.

"What's goin' on?"

"They got him!" she says relieved. "They finally got him."

We watch the coverage until we see the suspect being driven away. My mind is racing with so many conflicting thoughts and emotions. I feel comforted by the fact that he is in custody and no longer able to wreak havoc on our city. At the same time, I am heartbroken for those families and people who were affected. While his capture may bring some initial relief, it still changes nothing for them. It's hard to see a silver lining in situations like these.

"Ready to do the walk of shame?" she jokes as she puts her hoodie on over her tank top.

"There nothin' shameful about this. But yeah, let's head out."

* * *

I stuff myself into her mini-cooper while she straps Jake into his car seat. It takes everything in me not to bust up laughing at her with how crazy she is over this dog. The drive back to my place is pretty quiet.

"Sooo…" she starts, staring intently at her odometer.

"So, do you wanna maybe go out to dinner with me tomorrow night?"

Her smile is instantaneous and huge. "I'd like that."

We exchange numbers, and I tell her that I will pick her up tomorrow at 7:00 PM. Jake gives me paw, and Cookie gives me one hell of a kiss before we finally say our goodnights.

I watch her drive off until I can no longer see her tail lights, and for the first time in a long time I feel hopeful and excited about something. Who knows if Bella and I will go the distance. Hell, who knows if we'll even make it out the gate. But in light of the recent events, I know that tomorrow isn't promised, so I need to start living for today and putting myself out there more. And there is no time like the present so I shoot a quick text to Bella.

_Looking forward to tomorrow with you. Sweet dreams, Cookie._

* * *

**A/N: So initially I fully intended to end it right here. As a matter of fact, up until two days ago I planned to mark this complete today. But then I started thinking about it and I thought – why not – let's do an epi just to see if these two crazy kids make a go of it – yes?**

**Alright dolls, let's let it WIP…**

_**Never Judge By The Cover**_** by Postapocalypticdepository – This is a story told in 100 word drabbles and pals – this author is an absolute doll and bona fide wordsmith. I am having a blast reading this fic as each chapter leaves me guessing and thoroughly impressed with PAD's masterful depictions. My words cannot accurately articulate what she does so well – so make sure to go check it out and see for yourself. Also check out her other WIP, _Boys Will Be_.**

_**Bella Donna**_** by Jiffy Kate - *Carrie ZM skips up and taps the mic* JiffyKate has done it again dolls! This new WIP is smart and S-E-X-Y. We are only 10 chapters in, but nothing is as it seems. You don't want to miss this. And also, make sure to check out their other WIP _Crash Zone_ - it's sweet and funny just like the authors themselves. **

**And as always, if you haven't already - go check out our pal BlueisSoul's take on the Esquire article, One Night Stand in Locked-Down London. It's crazy sexy and funny and white hot *fans self*. Not to be missed!**

**Thanks so much to everyone who had read, reviewed, followed, fav'd, rec'd, FB'd, tweeted and lurked this fic! See you in two Thursdays!**


	6. Chapter 6 - Epilogue

**Rating: M**

**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyers owns all things Twilight - I just like to get weird with her characters.**

**Thanks to LovinRob for beta'ing – she smacked it up, flipped it and rubbed it down.  
****Thanks to Carrie ZM for doin' me… the honor of pre-reading this crazy fic.  
****Thanks to AmandaC3 for the fantastic banner.  
****And to the Triangle of Curls Girls for all of the encouragement.  
**

* * *

**Give me your best Boston accent  
one more time.**

* * *

**Epilogue **

**26 Months Later**

I hear her before I see her. Her heels are clacking on the pavement as she struts up the sidewalk. Garrett and Riley each call 'dibs' at the same time, but I know that she is here to see _me_. I push open the screen door to greet the leggy blonde approaching the porch. I have to hold back a laugh when Garrett and Riley's faces go from 'hopeful' to 'what the fuck' when she launches herself at me for a hug.

"Hi-ya handsome," she says squeezing me tight.

"How ya doin', Kate?" I ask over her shoulder as the guys look on in shock.

"Eh, can't complain."

She releases me and looks over at the guys and gives a small wave. Apparently introductions are in order.

"Guys, this is Bella's cousin, Kate." I start and see that Riley and Garrett are back in full on creep mode. "Kate, this is Riley," I say jerking my chin in his direction. "And this is…"

Before I can even say Garrett's name, Riley is up and has her hand in both of his like the cheesy fucker he is. Some things never change.

"Riley Hale. It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Wait…" she says surprised. "You're Riley?"

"Yeah," he says confused. "I'm sorry. Have we met?" He asks as he eyes her up and down like a pervert. "Because I am sure I'd remember meeting you."

His game is painful to watch.

"No, we've never met," she shakes her head and pulls him close to speak softly in his ear. "But I love your taste in lingerie."

He shoots me a dirty look like I am the one who showed her the picture while Kate giggles into her free hand.

"Bella told me to keep an eye out for you," she says between laughs. "I almost didn't recognize you without the word _dick_ written across your forehead."

He releases her hand and forces a smile before returning to his seat to sulk with his beer.

"And this is Garrett." I say, gesturing towards him as he jumps up to meet her.

"Anotha' ball-busta'," he says to her, shaking her hand and wagging his brows. "I like it."

I can't help but smirk at the scene before me. Riley is pouting like the spoiled little punk he is as he watches Kate lean in to her handshake with Garrett. I catch his eye and shrug as if to say '_sorry for ya, kid_'.

Em opens the screen door and lets Jake out before he comes to greet Kate.

"Emmett!" she squeals excitedly, Garrett all but forgotten.

"How ya' been, sweethaht?" he asks, pecking her on the cheek.

"I'm alright. I hear congratulations are in order."

"Yep," he smiles proudly and reaches into his wallet to grab their latest sonogram. "We're about 20 weeks."

I can hear the hope and excitement in his voice since this is the furthest along they've been so far. I watch as Kate nods while he points at all the kid's parts in the picture.

"Where is that little shit?" my dad yells as he marches up to the screen door and pushes it open forcefully.

"Liam's inside watchin' TV."

"No, not _that_ little shit," he says heatedly before jabbing his pointer finger in Jake's direction. "Your little shit! I had a six inch sub on the table and that little asshole snatched it and ate it."

Jake is wearing his signature _sorry, not sorry_ look and turns swiftly to piss on a nearby bush.

"Jacob!" I say in my stern voice, drawing his name out. "No thank you, sir!" I hate how Bella has me talking to him like I have a pussy too, so I try to recover in the manliest way possible. "Don't be a dick."

I don't even have to look at my dad to know that he is shaking his head at me in disgust muttering 'no thank you sir' under his breath.

"Dad, its fine, I'll just send Riley to get you another turkey sub. Take it easy."

"Ya mother's got me on this crazy diet, I'm stah-vin' to death over here," he explains holding his stomach. "Reception starts at seven and that means I won't eat until eight. All I wanted was to enjoy the six grams of fat ya mother allowed me before the wedding with a beer," he turns once more to give Jake a one-finger salute. "I hope ya get the shits!"

"Come on Mista' C, give him a break," Emmett says to my father and scoops Jake into his arms. "Bella's got him wearin' a tux. Isn't that punishment enough?"

"Actually, it's not." Kate cuts in and hands me a small bag from her purse. "Bella wants him to wear this top hat too."

I pull out a teeny-tiny top hat with a small chin strap. Jake is beggin' and pleadin' with his eyes for me to put my foot down and stop her insanity, but he is crazy if he thinks I am going toe-to-toe with the bride on our wedding day.

"Sorry kid." I say with a shrug.

Carlisle starts chuckling as he turns back into the house. Apparently he feels that justice is served.

"And here," Kate continues, handing me an envelope. "It's your wedding gift from Bella. She told me to tell you not to read it until right before you head up to the altar."

I check my watch and am immediately disappointed that I can't open it for another four hours. She knows the anticipation will kill me.

"Uh, lemme go get her gift real quick," I tell her over my shoulder as I run in the house to grab my gift and finish my note to her.

I don't trust any of the guys not to eat my gift to her, so I hid the half-dozen box of Sprinkles cupcakes in our bedroom. We are spending a small fortune on the wedding and honeymoon, so we decided to not spend a dime on our gifts to each other. I can't bring myself to be sorry for breaking the rule. I know she loves these things, and hopefully she will understand the meaning behind them.

I always think back to that morning of the lockdown when she told me the cupcakes were her one indulgence while living in New York. The one thing she did to make herself happy since she was basically living someone else's dream. In a way, I think she was kind-of like me before I met her, merely existing. I pick up the box and glance at the blank notecard. I want to write sappy shit to her like her 'happiness will be my only indulgence' or that our 'life will be sweet'. But that's not me. And that's not us. So I pick up the pen and scribble the first thing that comes to mind, which is the plain and simple truth.

_Happy Wife = Happy Life_

_I plan on making you very happy, Cookie.  
__I can't wait to marry you today.  
__ Love,  
__ Edward  
_

* * *

I am watching the Sox game with the guys when Bella's ringtone blares from my pocket about 45 minutes later. I jump up, grab my beer and start up the stairs as I answer.

"Hello." I say as I enter our bedroom, shutting the door behind me.

"I loved it," she tells me simply.

"Did ya?"

"Yeah," she says softly making me want to fist pump because she got the meaning behind it. "Did you open your gift yet?"

"Nope."

"Good."

"How are ya feelin'?" I ask her before taking a sip of my beer.

"Oh, you know," she teases.

"Nervous?" I ask and kind of cringe at the thought that she may be hesitant.

"Not a bit. You?"

"Nah," I say relieved at how quickly and confidently she answers. "I've wanted to marry you for a while now, Cookie."

Bella sighs because she knows how true it is, and I wonder if she is thinking back to how I told her that I loved her after dating for only two months. She's lucky that I didn't propose then and there. I remember how happy I was the day she called me to tell me she found the perfect house for us before we'd even discussed living together. I recall that at the time, I was trying to come up with a way to ask her to marry me and hoping that she wouldn't think it was all too soon.

I hear Alice bitching at her in the background, something about staying on schedule.

"I know, I know!" She shouts though it is muffled as I am sure she put her hand over the phone. "Sorry about that. Apparently I am throwing everything off schedule with this two minute conversation."

"Alright, I'll see you in a few hours."

"Don't forget to read it right before you go to the altar."

"I won't."

"Love you."

"I love you too, Cookie."

* * *

I feel Emmett's eyes on me as I aimlessly pace back and forth from the living room to the kitchen and back.

"What's with you, kid?" he asks before taking a pull from his beer. "You havin' second thoughts or somethin'?"

"Not at all," I tell him as I peel the label from my beer bottle. "I just feel anxious, you know. Like I want to get the show on the road already."

His phone beeps and he smiles as he reads the text.

"Rose wants some Red Vines. I'm gonna run up to the gas station and grab some for her," he tells me while texting her back before looking at me seriously. "Listen, I remember being where you are at and you gotta _relax_, kid."

He's smiling at me like he said something clever, but I must have missed it.

"What, like meditate or some shit?"

He snorts. "No. You gotta _relax_," he says drawing out the word relax and giving me the jack-off gesture.

"Pffft. You're crazy."

"I'm serious, man. I was the same way on my wedding day. Ya' need to take matters into your own hands and jack the beanstalk. Trust me on this. It will clear that tension right up."

"Jack the beanstalk? Do you hear yourself?"

"What?" He asks offended before continuing like the sarcastic prick he is. "Oh, I'm sorry do you prefer pump the python? Yank the crank? Whip the willy?" He asks ticking off fingers with each euphemism.

I shake my head at him. "Get outta here. I don't want your wife calling me to pick up her Twizzlers."

"It's Red Vines, and they're not for her, they're for the baby," he says with a curt nod as he opens the screen door. "But seriously, _handle _that."

I finish my beer and pace around the house some more, mulling over what he said. I mean, sure I'm on edge because I want today to be perfect for her. The tension may also be from the most epic case of blue balls on the planet. I remember two weeks ago she was riding me, and I was thirty seconds from bustin' a nut when she told me that it would be the last time we had sex until our wedding night.

I suppose I could just slip upstairs and take care of it. Why not, I've got some time to kill. Dad and the boys are grabbing a bite to eat, and I'm the only one here except for Jake. I hustle up the stairs and grab the iPad from the desk in the spare room. Jacking off isn't as easy as it used to be. Now it's a production of laying out Kleenex ever since Bella forbid me from using our bath towels and washcloths to catch my mess. I remember just nodding my head as she waved a hand towel around and yelled something about them being so stiff they could crack. I could do it in the shower, but I swear whenever I do she calls me on it. I don't know. I seem to recall her saying something about having a sensitive nose. She swears up and down that I nutted on her loofah. I think she's crazy.

I make quick work of my pants and boxers and click on my porn folder, aptly titled '_Fantasy Football' _so Bella will never know the depths of my depravity. A couple squirts of lotion and we are all set. Two lesbians come up on the screen. A red head is lying on her back with her hands pushing a blonde's face into her crotch. Red is laying the moans on real thick as the blonde dogs her out all loud and sloppy like. I start to stroke myself, hoping I get hard. After about a minute and only a semi-erection later, I realize I either need to change the scene on the screen or go to the mental spank reel. I close my eyes, and my mind automatically drifts to one of my favorite nights with Bella from our trip to Belize last year.

I remember chasing her into our room after a late night swim, watching her peel off her swimsuit and crawl into the bed slightly hidden by the netting. I see her there with her legs spread wide and her wet hair splayed out on the pillow. I can feel myself stiffen when I picture the way she looks at me while her hands work her body over. Two fingers deep inside while the other hand alternates from rubbing her clit and pulling her nipples.

I start to jerk it harder when I think about how she gasps and whimpers as I lick her salty skin and how her body shivers with each swipe of my tongue. I see her lips parting as I push inside of her, and I swear I can practically feel the way her pussy grips me as I slide in. I have to steady myself on the sink as I stroke my dick faster. The memory becomes more vivid. Pinning her down to the bed and forcefully pounding into her. The feel of her chest against mine, slick with sweat and coarse with sand from our midnight swim. Moaning and panting into each other's mouths in between rough open mouth kisses.

The memories come faster now as my climax looms. I fist my cock harder as I picture my hand gripping her hip as I take her from behind. The sound she makes when she sucks in a short intake of breath as I tug on her hair and bottom out inside of her. The way she arches her spine, encouraging each thrust. I swear I can feel her tighten around my length and hear the sounds of her muffled screams. It gets me off every single time. The swell of pride that comes from knowing that I'm the one who makes her come undone.

All I hear is the slapping of my skin and the rush of blood to my ears as I see snippets of Bella in various states of ecstasy switching off rapidly in my mind. I know I am almost there because I can hardly stand and I feel the telltale tensing and stiffening in my balls. I explode with a grunt a few strokes later, making sure to catch what I can in the tissues. I happen to take a glance at myself in the mirror. My breathing is labored and my skin is flushed, but I feel a lot less anxious. I guess I really needed that.

"Jesus." I mutter under my breath and tuck myself back into my boxers.

I go to grab my zipper when someone starts pounding on the door.

"What are ya doin' in there?" My dad yells through the door. "Pinch it off! I gotta take a piss."

"Use the bathroom downstairs!" I shout back as I carefully pull up my zipper, hoping to avoid a '_There's_ _Something about Mary'_ situation.

"No can do. Your idiot friend Riley bought Liam a milkshake."

_Shit_. That bathroom will be uninhabitable for the next few hours because the only one in my family more lactose intolerant than me is my nephew Liam.

"Gimme a second," I tell him as I clean up the evidence and wash my hands before stepping out of the bathroom.

"Mmm hmm," he mutters as I pass him, eyeing me knowingly.

* * *

"Five minutes, Edward."

I look up to see Father Aro standing in the doorway of the sacristy and give him a nod. Emmett stands and follows him out so I can finally read Cookie's letter.

_ April 18, 2015_

_Dear Edward,_

_I thought it would be appropriate to start writing this letter today, two years from the day we met. Two years from the day that our lives changed in the best possible way under the most awkward and unbelievably tragic circumstances. _

_Many times throughout the course of our relationship, I've caught you studying me, gauging my reactions, trying to figure me out. If I had a nickel for every time you've asked me what I am thinking, we'd be filthy rich. I know I am not overly expressive and given the fact that you are not a mind reader, I realize I am not always easy to read. So I thought since we agreed not to spend a penny on our gifts to each other that I would give you the gift of 'peace of mind' by giving you a piece of my mind. _

_I doubt you realize how hard and fast I fell for you. It felt effortless and easy. I remember squealing like a schoolgirl when I read your text after dropping you off the night of the lockdown. You should've just stayed the night since we texted back and forth until the early hours of the morning. Our first date was perfect and awkward. When you walked me to my door that night and handed me your doggie bag for Jake, well, let's just say that you totally won us both over with that move._

_ I remember the first time you told me you loved me. The look on your face was so earnest and I knew you meant it with every fiber of your being. You were so nervous. I remember your hands trembled a bit as you held mine. To say it back to you felt so natural and so freeing. There just are no words to express how happy I was at the thought that you loved me as much as I loved you. _

_ I also know the exact moment I knew I wanted to be with you forever. It was a few weeks after you told me you loved me and you were taking me to Martha's Vineyard for Fourth of July weekend. Do you know what I am talking about? Our first fight. I remember coming home to find Jake shaved and looking happier than I'd seen him in ages. Now I can admit that you were right and that he was miserable under all of that hair in the heat, but at the time I wanted to junk punch you for shaving my dog. All of my anger melted though the minute we got to your truck and I saw that you put in a car seat for Jake. I know you think car seats for dogs are ridiculous, so the fact that you were willing to do that for him (for me), well, let's just say that it just cemented the fact that you were a keeper._

_ I think that meeting your family sealed the deal for me 100%. I'll never forget the look on your face as you introduced me to your parents. You looked so happy and excited, but most importantly, you looked proud. Just as proud as your mother did as she paraded me around the church after mass that Sunday. I imagine that as we grow old together, we will be just like your parents. Me, the ball-buster and you and Jake, the ball-bustees. _

_Edward watching you with your nephews just made me fall in love with you all over again. There is something to be said for a man who will spend a Sunday building a blanket fort for two little boys. Seeing how wonderful you are with them and Jake, I just know you will be the best father to our future children. _

_Some of my favorite memories of you are from our many adventures together. Before we met, Rose always was complaining that she wanted more for you and wanted you to want more for yourself. I guess I was surprised that she described you that way because you are always up for anything. I loved your idea of the adventure jar. I remember you were so excited filling out those small pieces of torn paper and the look on your face when I pulled one of your slips from the jar, it was just priceless. Almost as priceless as your face when we actually zip-lined over the jungle in Belize a few months later. _

_The night you asked me to be your wife was by far and away the best night of my entire life. I've never been more sure of anything ever. I often think about the night we met. I did something so absolutely out of character for me. Under normal circumstances, I would have never put myself out there like that. But in light of the events, I realized that life is short and sometimes you just have to trust your instincts and follow your gut. It's like you always say, it was the smartest dumb thing we ever did._

_I am flipping through the pictures of our photo albums as I write this letter. So many fun and special memories have been made in our short time together and I have no doubt that we will make so many more. Hopefully you followed my directions and in a few short minutes, I will be walking down the aisle. I can't wait to marry you, Edward. I can't wait to become the future Mrs. Cookie Cullen. This will be our greatest adventure of all. _

_Love Always,_

_Cookie_

I read it again and again… and one more time after that.

"It's time." I hear Emmett say from the doorway. "You ready, kid?"

I fold the letter back up and stick it in the pocket next to my heart, right where she has been from the day we met. _Mrs. Cookie Cullen_, yeah, I like the sound of that.

I nod and breathe in deeply as I make my way to the altar, ready to start my life with her.

* * *

**A/N: And…. That's all for Bostonward, folks. **

**If you are interested in helping victims of the Boston Marathon bombings, please see my profile page for links. Special thanks to jaxg for the suggestion and the links.**

**Instead of letting it WIP this week, Carrie ZM and I decided that we want to spotlight a couple of authors who we think that… You Oughta Know.**

**Gothic Temptress – For me, Gothic Temptress is one of the brightest spots in this fandom. Not only is she a FANTASTIC writer whose stories encourage, empower, titillate and educate – she has the most amazing heart. I consider myself very lucky to know her, but even more fortunate to be able to call her my friend. Make sure to go check out her fics and get to know this amazing woman. **

**Thimbles – *Carrie ZM clutches heart and gums lips* Every now and again, a writer comes along whose stories captivate your head and fill your heart with hope. One of those authors for me is Thimbles. She is sweet and lovely and so, so kind. Her positivity is contagious and for that alone, I think you all should make your acquaintance with this wonderful author and her stories. **

**Special thanks to LovinRob for your beta magic, the hours you poured into this story and your friendship. We are like Rick Astley songs pal – Together Forever because I'm Never Gonna Give You Up.  
****To AmandaC3 for the banner and the bonus Edward in the pink robe manip – I love it and you!  
To Carrie ZM, I can't even – no words for how much fun I have doing stories and A/Ns with you. Love your positivity, your love for this fandom and the fics. Thanks for helping me pay it forward each week.  
To K.C/Fic You – not for nuthin' but thank you for all the help on all things Boston and keeping it authentic!  
To**** the Triangle of Curls Girls – thanks for the daily encouragement and the hottest YouTube video – you are all my boos for real!**

**And finally thanks to everyone who has read, reviewed, followed, fav'd, rec'd, tweeted, pimped and lurked this fic. You guys make this so much fun and I am so, so grateful!**

**Stay classy fandom! LAHM out…**


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